Monday, February 24, 2020

Sam Pink: The Proust Questionnaire

Sam Pink's new book The Ice Cream Man and Other Stories is coming out March 3 via Soft Skull PressThe first Sam Pink book I read was 'Person' and my immediate take was that it was so damn good yet so short but he managed to say so much about the mental state of the modern North American male. You could have given that book to any dude in this country and he would have recognized something about himself in those pages. Let's face it some people had 'Jesus' Son' and others had Sam Pink's 'Person.' Since that laudable debut Sam has been a non-stop, one man Death Metal band of creativity churning out more novels, short stories, poems, painting, drawings every day, every week, every year. Like Prince, he's become a master at every instrument. Just give him a studio and he'll create. Andy Warhol once admonished Lou Reed for being lazy. He said, Lou-- it's work, all that matters is work. Sam Pink learned that secret a long time ago.

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

That it doesn’t have to be always happening.

2. What is your greatest fear?

The charge move of Bald Bull when you fight him the second time. There’s just no logic to it.

3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

Being too handsome

4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Failure to accept consequences.

5. Which living person do you most admire?

Anyone who can face consequences.

6. What is your greatest extravagance?

The other day I drove around at night 4 wheeling and slipping around in snow in a quiet subdivision while smoking a cigar and listening to staticky classical music on radio. It was one of the most extravagant moments of my life.

7. What is your current state of mind?

Gripping as well as ripping. Gripping, yes, but only to rip. Ripping, yes, but only having gripped.

8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

Any virtue which you believe is more of an ornament rather than a duty.

9. On what occasion do you lie?

I have a hard time lying because what that amounts to is me admitting my reality isn’t strong enough. And that pisses me off!

10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?

I love every bit of it in no rhetorical/unfounded way. You should too.

11. Which living person do you most despise?

There are many but I’ve found I mostly only can despise someone/something if it’s in my way. Like if I have to. I don’t spend much time thinking about things or people I despise. It’s more like a tool in the toolkit of ‘others.’

12. What is the quality you most like in a man?

Not being a shithead.

13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?

Not being a shithead.

14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

‘or some shit.’

15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?

Probably anybody who shows that to me.

16. When and where were you happiest?

My brother and I just won the Stanley cup in NHL16 with team Italy and it was breathtaking.

17. Which talent would you most like to have?

Knowing a lot about fixing cars.

18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

Remain exactly the same but increased in size to rival any grizzly.

19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Not quitting on life/remaining stuck in negative things/wagering on life/any time I can beat my brother at the original Mario Kart.

20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?

A very small stone way up on a mountain.

21. Where would you most like to live?

Around the area I’m in now but in a slightly more remote area with a small house and a lot of land.

22. What is your most treasured possession?

A ‘gold medal/first place’ thing made out of paper from my youngest brother when he was in kindergarten.

23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

Forgetting who you are.

24. What is your favorite occupation?

Condemning dead ends in thinking/feeling.

25. What is your most marked characteristic?

My poisonous thorny tail.

26. What do you most value in your friends?

Being a good friend.

27. Who are your favorite writers?

The ones who are CRUSHING IT like ROCKSTARS

28. Who is your hero of fiction?


29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?

The guy who said the earth revolves around the sun and not the other way around.

30. Who are your heroes in real life?

My brothers/friends.

31. What are your favorite names?

I met a lady named Trudy the other day. I liked that.

32. What is it that you most dislike?

Bullshit. My oldest enemy.

33. What is your greatest regret?

Not carnally pursuing the ‘sexy grandma’ I saw in palm springs

34. How would you like to die?

In the middle of witnessing someone laughing at a funny thing I just said.

35. What is your motto?

Thumbs over crumbs.