tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26844441636094253622024-02-23T18:04:24.537-08:00Mi patria es la literatura.often it is the only / thing / between you and impossibility / no drink / no woman's love / no wealth/ can / match it / nothing can save you/ except writing.
Charles Bukowskimi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.comBlogger437125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-79511919228115846832024-02-07T20:32:00.000-08:002024-02-07T20:32:40.012-08:00TMMIB Kirkus Review<p><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: x-large;"> <span style="font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;">"Zablah fills his stories with striking metaphors...</span><span style="font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;">loads his concise prose with indelible passages...</span><span style="font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;">enthralling, well-written tales of life and love." ---- </span><em style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;">Kirkus Reviews</em></span></p><p><span style="color: #800180; font-size: x-large;"><em style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;"><br /></em></span></p><p><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: x-large;"><em style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif;">CLICK <a href="https://www.kirkusreviews.com/book-reviews/fawzy-zablah/this-modern-man-is-beat/" target="_blank">HERE</a></em></span></p><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpEGDPn67yRoG3zh8-tWh2HAVSeeiZIwzIDFuKIzEbSj3AaQTaczb0J-iSGE3ItYSozm3bzcfGmXkAXzMySCOiEYm-2eNl-n76Lg-M_ztuk0W0R5bjtqZwGSgC2HdV5Qoet0JDFFswc_uL3RsTMdF7h1SGkAr8WaR-JdNnr3wa5nqgNycVjktMgAFAvROD/s3508/modernman3-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3508" data-original-width="2480" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpEGDPn67yRoG3zh8-tWh2HAVSeeiZIwzIDFuKIzEbSj3AaQTaczb0J-iSGE3ItYSozm3bzcfGmXkAXzMySCOiEYm-2eNl-n76Lg-M_ztuk0W0R5bjtqZwGSgC2HdV5Qoet0JDFFswc_uL3RsTMdF7h1SGkAr8WaR-JdNnr3wa5nqgNycVjktMgAFAvROD/w452-h640/modernman3-2.jpg" width="452" /></a></div><br /><em style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "Noto Sans", sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br /></em></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-65120233908637178472024-01-04T06:28:00.000-08:002024-01-04T06:29:52.479-08:00Tel Aviv Blues, October 5th @ Times of Israel<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq52YYfou1TbpK_06EODceP9axbFGwylBQtjG64Dgv7aEAbtsrRiHMzOCRDVYbXOypR9rLKGTe4vrwxBp9wjEfEoXXAagQNRkM0GI3PDal7Bes1un8a8hGo068g1_5VwqYAKED-eeA3Lw5BPiUFiNimGPoLo9nfh0UPrs8dtK8iTihet-za_vT443wd_uZ/s1557/image0%20(13).jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1557" data-original-width="1170" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq52YYfou1TbpK_06EODceP9axbFGwylBQtjG64Dgv7aEAbtsrRiHMzOCRDVYbXOypR9rLKGTe4vrwxBp9wjEfEoXXAagQNRkM0GI3PDal7Bes1un8a8hGo068g1_5VwqYAKED-eeA3Lw5BPiUFiNimGPoLo9nfh0UPrs8dtK8iTihet-za_vT443wd_uZ/w480-h640/image0%20(13).jpeg" width="480" /></a></div><br /> <p></p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;">READ THE FULL STORY <a href="https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/tel-aviv-blues/" target="_blank">HERE</a></span></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-20829456312341618742023-09-26T20:52:00.000-07:002023-09-26T20:52:10.428-07:00This Modern Man is Beat --Nov. 1st Publication Date<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQk38i0XW1dTM3vVAwxtao-RRNb_jU8Sd7ZgEA1I61aGR6MkWUrMnHygd81mwbhcv6ydPc6VwAp_WCBY2wb3lDhb62yVMFh_PdoaLBkg1S9bBkcjebfJCSG0kyrOUgEW52K9zLCleph9qP6dmP2sFXgjBdsGUuanYfmixd3ngFMv5-__7TAxMx_k__VTgn/s3508/modernman3-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3508" data-original-width="2480" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQk38i0XW1dTM3vVAwxtao-RRNb_jU8Sd7ZgEA1I61aGR6MkWUrMnHygd81mwbhcv6ydPc6VwAp_WCBY2wb3lDhb62yVMFh_PdoaLBkg1S9bBkcjebfJCSG0kyrOUgEW52K9zLCleph9qP6dmP2sFXgjBdsGUuanYfmixd3ngFMv5-__7TAxMx_k__VTgn/w452-h640/modernman3-2.jpg" width="452" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><br /></p><p> <span style="font-size: large;"> Pre-Orders start Oct. 15 and Publication is Nov. 1st</span></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"> Click here >>>>>>> <a href="https://simipress.com/books/this-modern-man-is-beat/" target="_blank">SIMI PRESS WEBSITE</a></span></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-396347756318524672023-06-29T09:14:00.004-07:002023-06-29T09:14:56.372-07:00THIS MODERN MAN IS BEAT TO BE PUBLISHED BY SIMI PRESS FALL 2023<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUM1hZqS-kqI2bjiweZcyhRRwcpuv9MnfyYC1bzSKUEF5wtlXjBcBkWLxntVvY8E7CBTOQkTVpgJC2o9lWSWch0f3JCip0Q7bjWm0UI_O7OpdOaeFufWRxXofGajxOEITlX9Eb9jF1wN4QDzDg1qqEr5yrBHzQzgNf_QwozpvxkK9Jen4M7zIn5V3Za_OU/s615/ModernManisBeatCOVERFAWZYSIMIPRESS.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="615" data-original-width="371" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUM1hZqS-kqI2bjiweZcyhRRwcpuv9MnfyYC1bzSKUEF5wtlXjBcBkWLxntVvY8E7CBTOQkTVpgJC2o9lWSWch0f3JCip0Q7bjWm0UI_O7OpdOaeFufWRxXofGajxOEITlX9Eb9jF1wN4QDzDg1qqEr5yrBHzQzgNf_QwozpvxkK9Jen4M7zIn5V3Za_OU/w386-h640/ModernManisBeatCOVERFAWZYSIMIPRESS.png" width="386" /></a></div><br /></span><div><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: medium;"> LATE FALL 2023 TO BE PUBLISHED BY <a href="https://simipress.com/" target="_blank">SIMI PRESS</a></span><p></p></div><div><span style="font-size: large;">(mock-up poster cover)</span></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-9839164892036422242023-06-27T13:36:00.002-07:002023-06-27T14:31:26.709-07:00Proust Questionnaire: DuVay Knox<span><br /><br /> <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirZhljC3AZzLpIuZzMJoGgkOfpF8f6OcQ3TEOMz5QoA2JsLKlb8MUqs9O7iMF6gy0fprxAE2gS45Ugh2RL8D2QJsosdSlLbZHnvjpoJv7DLKL3Fy7F9uSX0jv4Kt7LKEqqUOAycvo8Ax72geESaifQ7O6zOba_fTKX9-NXumIsntN36dxUo7BibVaaGWUk/s500/Reverend%20Nigga%20Daddy.jpg" style="font-size: x-large;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirZhljC3AZzLpIuZzMJoGgkOfpF8f6OcQ3TEOMz5QoA2JsLKlb8MUqs9O7iMF6gy0fprxAE2gS45Ugh2RL8D2QJsosdSlLbZHnvjpoJv7DLKL3Fy7F9uSX0jv4Kt7LKEqqUOAycvo8Ax72geESaifQ7O6zOba_fTKX9-NXumIsntN36dxUo7BibVaaGWUk/w400-h400/Reverend%20Nigga%20Daddy.jpg" width="400" /></a><br /><br /><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.clashbooks.com/new-products-2/duvay-knox-the-pussy-detective-preorder" target="_blank">DuVay Knox</a> is forging his own path, yet at the same time, paying tribute to the great black pulp writers of the past like Iceberg Slim and Donald Goines.</span></span><div><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">When a writer finds their voice, authentic and not forced by any trends, or engineered by creative writing workshop professors and their agents, their prose will tend to glow like a briefcase full of gold amongst the manufactured voices trying so hard to sound like a Wallace or a an Updike or a Franzen.</span></div><div><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><span>His novel, <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Pussy-Detective-DuVay-Knox/dp/1955904138/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1S220P49M4PYA&keywords=the+pussy+detective&qid=1687798477&s=books&sprefix=the+pussy+detective%2Cstripbooks%2C107&sr=1-2" target="_blank">The Pussy Detective</a> (</i>CLASH BOOKS, 2022) is for the reader that has no hang ups, and is of the mind to devour storytelling that doesn't apologize or pull punches and will make you laugh out loud as it descrambles your brain from today's newspeak invading our daily lives.</span><br /><br /><br /><span>1--What is your idea of perfect happiness?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><span>Fucking and Traveling. Or Fucking Traveling.</span><br /><br /><br /><span>2--What is your greatest fear? </span><br /> <br /><span>The coming invasion of Gay Zombies.</span><br /><br /><br /><span>3--What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?</span><br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Impatience.<br /><br /><br />4--What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Bullyism.<br /><br /><br />5--Which living person do you most admire?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">TABITHA BLAIR<br /><br /><br />6--What is your greatest extravagance?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Black n Mild Cigarillos.<br /><br /><br />7--What is your current state of mind?<br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5d9JsqXZP1M" target="_blank">Godlike</a>. </span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Im in the zone with my writing these days.<br /><br /><br />8--What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Kindness.<br /><br /><br />9--On what occasion do you lie?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Talkin to Bitches.<br /><br /><br />10--What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Im not a 7 Footer like I shooda been.<br /><br /><br />11--Which living person do you most despise?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Any Black Intellectual.<br /><br /><br />12--What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Ion like men like that.<br /><br /><br />13--What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">My SEMEN. Because its very high quality.<br /><br /><br />14--Which words or phrases do you most overuse? <br /> <br />I say NO way more than YES to shit.<br /><br /><br />15--What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">TABITHA BLAIR/Co-Owner of <a href="https://www.blackpulpfictionpublishinghouse.com/" target="_blank">Black Pulp Fiction</a>.<br /><br /><br />16--When and where were you happiest? <br /> <br />My Daddy's <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gs45iVQe6O0" target="_blank">Nuts</a>.<br /><br /><br />17--Which talent would you most like to have?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Majickal Powers.<br /><br /><br />18--If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Ability to Draw.<br /><br /><br />19--What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Being Born a Real Nigga.<br /><br /><br />20--If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZX5o2cHKGk8" target="_blank">A Real Nigga</a>.<br /><br /><br />21--Where would you most like to live? <br /> <br />Niggadom.<br /><br /><br />22--What is your most treasured possession?<br />My collection of panties from every woman I have fucked over the years.<br /><br /><br />23--What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4yXBIigZbg" target="_blank">DEATH</a>.<br /><br /><br />24--What is your favorite occupation? <br /> <br />Writing Erotic Occult Folklore n Being a Bard of the Oral Griot Tradition.<br /><br /><br />25--What is your most marked characteristic?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">My Intuition is highly developed.<br /><br /><br />26--What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Loyalty.<br /><br /><br />27--Who are your favorite writers? </span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Robert DeCoy/<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiuU8oGfdHQ" target="_blank">Iceberg Slim</a>/Nathan Heard/<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qEI7TMRs74" target="_blank">Donald Goines</a>/Gayl Jones/Zora Neale Hurston/Gloria Naylor/Jade Sharma/Clarence Cooper Jr/Tabitha Blair/<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVkv3Bbxkwg" target="_blank">Leroi Jones</a>/Dante Alighieri/Francis Bacon/Giacoma Casanova/Niccolo Machiavelli/Baltasar Gracian/Eldridge Cleaver/George Jackson/Jamaica Kincaid/Paul Laurence Dunbar<br /><br /><br />28--Who is your hero of fiction?<br /><br /> </span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Stagolee/John Henry/Shine<br /><br /><br />29--Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AA1lGhtkoFc" target="_blank">Nat Turner</a><br /><br /><br />30--Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #a64d79; font-size: x-large;">Well-since mah Daddy up n Died--Any Nigga dat takes on Whitey and The System.<br /><br /><br />31--What are your favorite names?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #a64d79;">Old School ones, for example: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bzq24rxUNE" target="_blank">BERTHA</a> for wommin .... or LEROY for men.<br /><br /></span><br /><span style="color: #800180;">32--What is it that you most dislike?</span><br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #800180; font-size: x-large;">Cumming too kwik.<br /><br /><br />33--What is your greatest regret?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #800180; font-size: x-large;">I shoulda been a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBiewQrpBBA" target="_blank">Contender</a> (boxing).<br /><br /><br />34--How would you like to die?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #800180; font-size: x-large;">In sum Pussy.<br /><br /><br />35--What is your motto?<br /><br /></span></span></div><div><span><span style="color: #800180; font-size: x-large;">The Worlds Smartest/Rude/Raw & Unadulterated Nigga.</span></span></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-49309181943210522632022-10-25T17:22:00.000-07:002022-10-25T17:22:28.050-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Gwen Hilton <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVfA6nDXoi0v-JAyVC6VRap5aJMsyCe9TdrFBpAvhV51Y-53sBV9SJ1GN-XP2n9NNc5gsqdtd4THSe4WaF393Bnmk50ddjPr1oY6Rg4caMG4rgFHh5cflYPedt_ZWGu0NtuFIMZE9Mb0Lpx6FvX-de1nJDqGNzPR5uS0mcy3po6g2Pkj400YNB1gPFUw/s400/IMG_9040.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="400" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVfA6nDXoi0v-JAyVC6VRap5aJMsyCe9TdrFBpAvhV51Y-53sBV9SJ1GN-XP2n9NNc5gsqdtd4THSe4WaF393Bnmk50ddjPr1oY6Rg4caMG4rgFHh5cflYPedt_ZWGu0NtuFIMZE9Mb0Lpx6FvX-de1nJDqGNzPR5uS0mcy3po6g2Pkj400YNB1gPFUw/w400-h400/IMG_9040.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div><span style="color: #e06666;"><br /></span></span><br /></span><div><span style="color: #e06666; font-size: x-large;">Last week it was Jon Berger and now Gwen Hilton. So happy to see these new young writers develop in real time. Writers I can proudly call my friends. There is no cynicism, no careerism, no sign of unscrupulous ambition but only a love for books, good friendships and literature.</span><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;">I first met Gwen Hilton when she reached out to me via twitter over a year ago after reading my contribution to </span><a href="https://expatpress.com/product/expat-4/" target="_blank">Expat 4</a><span style="color: #e06666;">. At that time, or at that specific moment in time, I was a little bummed out about my own writing. Every writer goes through it. You feel like you're writing into the void and the world could care less. </span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;">There are many reasons why that type of thinking is wrong, but the biggest reason is that the physical act of writing itself, even without publishing or having anyone read it, is still a otherworldly act like shedding past versions of yourself; a reconstruction of memory if you will, and if done right, a confession to the universe; a universe that is inside you. It's also actively talking yourself into existence. Yes it is. And you are the audience, and that's all you need. (ask PESSOA) </span></span><span style="color: #e06666; font-size: xx-large;">Everything else is just the cherry on top. </span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;">The note Gwen sent me was just what the doctor ordered and it snapped me out of it: All she said was that she really enjoyed my story and thanked me for writing it. So we became friends, and I sent her my novel for free. I offered her Ciao! Miami for free too, but she said she'd rather buy it. This is exactly how so many beautiful Twitter friendships begin. </span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;">And now, I'm happy to say that my friend Gwen has spoken herself into </span><a href="https://expatpress.com/product/sent-to-the-silkworm-house-gwen-hilton/" target="_blank">existence</a><span style="color: #e06666;">. She's the type of writer that I admire because she has fun with it. That's it. As you read her </span><a href="http://www.witchcraftmag.com/magazine/gwen-hilton-john-hinckley" target="_blank">words</a><span style="color: #e06666;">, you realize she's on Cloud 9 tapping away on that magical "typewriter" because it's a direct transfer of joy from the author on the page to the reader at home, or in the park, or sitting in their car. That's the only real goal all writers should have: to transfer the joy. (I may be sounding like a hippie right now, but hippies are saints! Let's go back to being hippies.)</span></span><div><div><span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: #e06666;">-FZ-<br /></span><br /><span style="color: #e06666;"> _1.__What is your idea of perfect happiness?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d never have to work for money again. If I ever made enough to only do what I wanted I could live judiciously. I’d commit my time to a variety of art practices, bowling, walking, giving back to my community, and spending time with my partner. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__2.__What is your greatest fear?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I don’t want to lose the love I have. I live as if this is my only attempt at life. I would like to keep the relationships I have. Love is all you want at the end. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__3.__What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />General hubris. I am vain and proud and frequently spiteful. Nothing gets me working harder than a fuck you I won’t say. I spent my youth wanting to take over the world, worked for a man who lived by the motto “global domination is just around the corner”, and despite all the sea changes in my being I don’t only want to be the best. I want to be everything. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__4.__What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Cowardice. Cowards make everyone else in their life do heavy lifting for them. I was a coward and I get why people didn’t like me at that point. I had no reason to be a coward other than my own self-loathing and manufactured distance from others. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__5.__Which living person do you most admire?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />It’s a corny answer, but my mother. She has thrived through things I’d never survive. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__6.__What is your greatest extravagance?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I have an extensive physical media collection. I like to collect art. I consider my relationship to plastic often. I like to spend and I like to be spent on. I’m a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6p-lDYPR2P8" target="_blank">material girl</a> in a material world.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__7.__What is your current state of mind?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Peaceful. I’m on a sort-of sabbatical that has been more than productive. I have had once-in-a-lifetime opportunities and after a decade of deep existential dread I have completed goals I can die happy with. My life for the past few years, and realistically in its entirety is richer than that of most royalty. I’m fortunate to say that under 30. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__8.__What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Modesty. You can honestly assess yourself while still being confident and even proud. There’s no need for modesty if you understand the value of humility. This is mincing, but there’s a difference. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__9.__On what occasion do you lie?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I love to lie about what movies I’ve seen. Have my whole life. Some lies I’ve maintained because it’s better than seeing the movies. When I miss the boat on something everyone loved I get to have my own private relationship with the film this way. I only recently watched the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPl5MeXIM8E" target="_blank">Lord of the Rings</a> series after lying about having seen it most of my life. It was fine. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__10.__What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d like new tits. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMGaOm_ekX4" target="_blank">Tits</a> so nice no one ever looks at my face again. Patron if you’re reading this. I know I’ll have good hair in a few years. I do believe I’m incredibly beautiful. Now that I’m a “smart writer” I can be <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJI8YPopjgk" target="_blank">ugly hot</a>. Still, I want new tits. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__11.__Which living person do you most despise?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’m trying to give up on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXekWMcCrLM" target="_blank">hate</a> because it really is corrosive and slows you down. It’s like feeling the after effects of adrenaline while feeling the adrenaline. With that said I can’t name them. Thinking long term. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__12.__What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I like a man who is direct. I think a man that is <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l77EEsMA1Qw" target="_blank">direct</a> (hopefully) comes with a bouquet of admirable qualities. The direct men in my life know what they want or know how to start on that path. They communicate effectively. They are considerate of the people around them. I shoot straight and I’ve met a lot of men who can’t. Women have to shoot straight unless they’ve had supremely cozy lives.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__13.__What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I like confident women. Walking tall is hard. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__14.__Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Dude, hell yeah, swag, nice, swagula, rad, radical, like, best, oh jeez, ope, fuck, shit, well<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__15.__What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />My partner Emma is the greatest love of my life. I have been in and out of love before I met her. This is the most open attempt I’ve made and I don’t want to lose it. We met before the pandemic and have had more time than most couples have in the first years to grow strong and close. She is exactly the person I’ve wanted to marry since I was maybe 12. And 15, and 18, and 21, and 22 when we met. It’s been incredible to grow and learn with her. I don’t think I’m the lifelong ideal for her and that’s okay. That’s a unique joy I get to experience. She is a pillar of the art community and when we met she was working mostly in a rental store. It’s a disgusting trope of slovenly losers to want to date the rental store/used art/media store employee, but I was that person before shit like Scott Pilgrim existed. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__16.__When and where were you happiest?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Right now. I had a very short list of goals before I die that must be completed and it took me only 18 months. Even dream goals were achieved early. At this point, there are only a few people I’d like to do readings with that are alive. I’d like to see my book as a signifier of something in a meme and in the first or second image of an in-the-know date on Tinder. Otherwise, I’ve had a better life than I ever thought I would. I need much bigger goals.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__17.__Which talent would you most like to have?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d like to be the world’s <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdOjVsfuKPs" target="_blank">best bowler</a> or have the ability to play multiple instruments very well. Like <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0HB8ybKJzo" target="_blank">improv jazz</a> good. Both take practice I could put in now. That’s attainable. It’s just about time.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__18.__If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d get rid of my asthma. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__19.__What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I think my <a href="https://expatpress.com/product/sent-to-the-silkworm-house-gwen-hilton/" target="_blank">book</a> is my greatest achievement at this time. Everything else is too soon to tell. I don’t want this to be my final answer in life to this question. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__20.__If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d like to be me again. There’s always work to do. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__21.__Where would you most like to live?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d like a house in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nURO2ihW2mI" target="_blank">Moab</a>. If I could keep my place in Chicago and have a house in Moab I’d be the happiest person on Earth. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__22.__What is your most treasured possession?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I have a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDA-phXyYH8" target="_blank">Blockbuster</a> gift card that says movie star with a blurry mirror on it. I’ve had that gift card all my life. I used to look at myself in it and imagine a future bigger than anyone had ever seen. I have a lot of nice things and it would be sad to list something based on asset value. This object is worth nothing, but I’d probably cry if I lost it or threw it out. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__23.__What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />True loneliness. There’s nothing wrong with being alone, but if you’ve shut everyone else out absolute loneliness can kill. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__24.__What is your favorite occupation?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />If I could make a living wage with good benefits as a niche store clerk I would. Having a real job while still interacting with people would be nice. If I taught meditation courses that’d be a sweet gig. Paid to be chill and present. Life couldn’t get any better. I guess that’s actually attainable for me, but not everyone is into the hair-on-fire type of presence to the moment like I am. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__25.__What is your most marked characteristic?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />My loudness. It is well known that you know when Gwen Hilton is coming. I have a laugh that resonates for blocks. I have heard all my life that I do not have an indoor voice. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__26.__What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Openness. You can tell when it clicks and sometimes it happens immediately. I think at the base that begins with openness. Trust and loyalty are commitments and those are only founded in openness. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__27.__Who are your favorite writers?<br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMRODrhGsBQ" target="_blank"><br />Charles Willeford</a>, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnUZSEi7oBo" target="_blank">Sam Pink</a>, Dennis Cooper, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvUcasP6BLM&t=351s" target="_blank">Herman Melville</a>, and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kh0C5z79apA" target="_blank">Cormac McCarthy</a> are the big five. Calvin Westra, Big Bruiser Dope Boy, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_i3njzlPIvY" target="_blank">Manuel Marrero</a>, Fawzy Zablah, Kyle R. Siebel, Jillian Luft, Jackie Ess, DuVay Knox, and Jesse Hilson are the writers working today that I try to read everything they write. I am still a young reader. I’ve read less than 500 books. I hope I do not look back and feel like I left names off. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__28.__Who is your hero of fiction?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I started wearing almost exclusively jumpsuits because of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unFY8E1qua4" target="_blank">Hoke Moseley</a>. I cooled off because of him too. He’s about as real to me as any person. Hero isn’t the right phrase, but I started living differently after reading the <a href="https://crimereads.com/the-life-and-times-of-charles-willeford-miamis-weird-wonderful-master-of-noir/" target="_blank">Hoke Moseley series</a>. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__29.__Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhHCGqbWD8g" target="_blank">Jesus Christ</a>. I’d put myself on the shortlist as a potential second coming of Christ. Caligula, maybe. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__30.__Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Michael Maniacci, my mentor is my hero. He is the smartest man I’ve ever met and also has the most open heart. A rare combination. When I spend time with him I feel like I’m getting closer to everything.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__31.__What are your favorite names?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Gwen, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsOwj0PR5Sk" target="_blank">Emma</a>, Hoss, Fritz, Bladee, Paris, Manny, Carlos, Kaitlyn, Paul, Slade, and Kim. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__32.__What is it that you most dislike?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />People who think <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTb3GR6yrQI" target="_blank">wealth</a> is equivalent to culture or knowledge. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__33.__What is your greatest regret?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />How I have handled my interpersonal life at times.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__34.__How would you like to die?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I’d like to die having sex. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br />__35.__What is your motto?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Shoot your <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JA7G7AV-LT8" target="_blank">shot</a>. </span></span></span><div><span><span><span style="color: #e06666; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span><span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqEKLz3dk_46gnySOEpkGvcAKIw5Q2D6VUGwqo4jyFnGqYM8nERwV4wdCHuFg0AKF_3XKsLqPJdJ3_zlzgzQ4D28Vx-1T1Uoei09_wOl9YBSlve3fkcDcSc6WUmq7yfWAnV5BKjep5UdtQ-ihwK_hayTD19XWlAWlkP2zgsA2KfmuvrAF3CBygT5wW_Q/s4032/IMG_2346%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqEKLz3dk_46gnySOEpkGvcAKIw5Q2D6VUGwqo4jyFnGqYM8nERwV4wdCHuFg0AKF_3XKsLqPJdJ3_zlzgzQ4D28Vx-1T1Uoei09_wOl9YBSlve3fkcDcSc6WUmq7yfWAnV5BKjep5UdtQ-ihwK_hayTD19XWlAWlkP2zgsA2KfmuvrAF3CBygT5wW_Q/w480-h640/IMG_2346%20(1).jpg" width="480" /></span></a></div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span><span style="color: #e06666; font-size: xx-large;"><br /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-73659796968583878452022-10-12T05:13:00.000-07:002022-10-12T05:13:47.212-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Jon Berger the Goon Dog<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMD_n_0eIRAjCmVn0r9Y4fSZVi3bZ6qyUap6knPu6GuFcfL4HEjBrmFlVgQl3zDghT1ZExZuuR5w2vOL-UpHXn-XoLxuNM2I_RBVa8yq2fehDYnNTxgCKC4lCKJPFf4YK0RyMu_rNnJXNYyO-UKdvNTCGCiSJ6kNoIxxoLqj6sErHiBhP8BZwDN3blw/s4032/IMG_1976.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMD_n_0eIRAjCmVn0r9Y4fSZVi3bZ6qyUap6knPu6GuFcfL4HEjBrmFlVgQl3zDghT1ZExZuuR5w2vOL-UpHXn-XoLxuNM2I_RBVa8yq2fehDYnNTxgCKC4lCKJPFf4YK0RyMu_rNnJXNYyO-UKdvNTCGCiSJ6kNoIxxoLqj6sErHiBhP8BZwDN3blw/w480-h640/IMG_1976.JPG" width="480" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;">Jon Berger's debut short story collection, <a href="https://gobpilepress.bigcartel.com/product/pre-order-goon-dog-by-jon-berger" target="_blank">Goon Dog</a>, was just released by Gob Pile Press. I'm about finished with it, and a review will be forthcoming shortly on this here blog. Jon has that Kerouac talent of peppering just the right amount of love for his characters, which reveals itself in every story. You know that love, the one you have for your imperfect friends and all the wonderfully wrecked follies of your youth. His stories are squeezable, and are universal in the sense that they remind you of your own childhood friends that turned into good stories to tell, those beautiful, damaged souls that help build every bit of character you have once you reach adulthood. It's the best kind of American nostalgia.<br /><br />1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?<br /> <br />Someplace far away with an ocean and a waterfall and big trees and cliffs and nobody can tell me what to do.<br /> <br /> <br /> 2. What is your greatest fear?<br /> <br />Being taken advantage of<br /> <br /> <br /> 3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?<br /> <br />anger<br /> <br /> <br /> 4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /> <br /> hypocrisy<br /> <br /><br /></span><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire?<br /> <br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Krp20mPbSnQ" target="_blank">Keanu Reeves</a><br /> <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance?<br /> <br />Mountain bike<br /> <br /> <br /> 7. What is your current state of mind?<br /> <br />head cold but comfortable and content. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41mQLDA38TI" target="_blank">The Lions</a> are losing. <br /> <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">+ 10 charisma<br /> <br /> <br /> 9. On what occasion do you lie?<br /> <br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwfNjGxa_D4" target="_blank">job interviews</a><br /> <br /> <br /> 10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /> <br />I don’t have wings<br /> <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">11. Which living person do you most despise?<br /> <br />Anyone who is a politician<br /> <br /> <br /> 12. What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">acceptance<br /> <br /> <br /> 13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /> <br />acceptance<br /> <br /> <br /> 14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /> <br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2Mbj06Ns2Y" target="_blank">dude. </a><br /><br />my ears are ringing. <br /><br />I can’t beat the god damn fucking fire giant in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMMuXVZ8OHE" target="_blank">Elden Ring</a>.<br /> <br /> <br /> 15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">my dead dog<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?<br /> <br />Late teens – early twenties. Hometown, prowling the streets and backroads.<br /> <br /> <br /> 17. Which talent would you most like to have?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">music<br /> <br /> <br /> 18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /> <br />Learning disability in math<br /> <br /> <br /> 19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /> <br /><a href="https://gobpilepress.bigcartel.com/product/pre-order-goon-dog-by-jon-berger" target="_blank">Goon Dog</a><br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /> <br /> Golden Eagle <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> 21. Where would you most like to live?<br /> <br /> Somewhere secluded on the coast of the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lrUxMPdULQ" target="_blank">Keweenaw peninsula</a><br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> 22. What is your most treasured possession?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CDW8LNec1Q" target="_blank">Vegeta</a> statue that I’ll never disclose the price of<br /> <br /> <br /> 23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">envy<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">jumping over cars or running through wood paneled walls in basements or mosh pits<br /> <br /> <br /> 25. What is your most marked characteristic?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">physical strength<br /> <br /> <br /> 26. What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">super powers and big hugs and sharp claws. Ride or die mentality<br /> <br /> <br /> 27. Who are your favorite writers?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQuowHsNqtQ" target="_blank">Jim Harrison</a>, Murakami, Bud Smith, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziUYE3Xaww4" target="_blank">Scott McClanahan</a>, Larry Brown, Steve Anwyll, Sam Pink, Jon Lindsay, Donald Ray Pollock, Oscar Wilde, Kafka, Ottessa<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?<br /> <br />The Pinconning Orange Juice Guy<br /> <br /> <br /> 29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucian" target="_blank">Lucian of Samosata</a><br /> <br /> <br /> 30. Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giles_Corey" target="_blank">Giles Corey</a>. Anything that faces adversity.<br /> <br /> <br /> 31. What are your favorite names?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Spike <br /><br />Jet<br /> <br /> <br /> 32. What is it that you most dislike?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers on a day with high humidity<br /> <br /> <br /> 33. What is your greatest regret?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">not pursuing writing or art earlier due to the fear of what other people in my hometown or family might think or say.<br /> <br /> <br /> 34. How would you like to die?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">feeling lucky<br /> <br /> <br /> 35. What is your motto? <br /><br />I think you should kick my ass</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpkd77hnRJ2jqmpw5EpbmJhBXQTnTof_DW2iNZ6JdnV5_GaVItnG_SN6tUqNihUVhfCX-VF155Qm64M-hqExMCD70qbk7QeF9mH1bZ_dKUjlkbHtZL23G9cWEUFBaD33txuMp8xtxcymsRpeUpT8pO-l0wOWnxWIDvCBdpR3qI1nLpOz0lGhBgB17BnQ/s1155/GoonDog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1155" data-original-width="1134" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpkd77hnRJ2jqmpw5EpbmJhBXQTnTof_DW2iNZ6JdnV5_GaVItnG_SN6tUqNihUVhfCX-VF155Qm64M-hqExMCD70qbk7QeF9mH1bZ_dKUjlkbHtZL23G9cWEUFBaD33txuMp8xtxcymsRpeUpT8pO-l0wOWnxWIDvCBdpR3qI1nLpOz0lGhBgB17BnQ/w628-h640/GoonDog.jpg" width="628" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-606798883920879322022-09-13T14:45:00.000-07:002022-09-13T14:45:54.084-07:00A Kaddish for Saddam Hussein by Fawzy Zablah<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yTz-4kBRq4LZRUJAZr5EEsHtlTboxtwZwJ0t-vd-PVwZm5IRIxpZStrACHYf9ZI8kdsZvuChOkiXBrr4uSKpVfmnR3LMAtS66_IB0Afo1dqor8YRTxrLT13sssSwq0mVBZgVDW-H1wK-n7f61Ir4XEy6EErZK1ZPNoI_-8b7BVWpBwHDhEMkf5SKig/s663/Saddam%20Hussein,%20by%20Mr_%20Brainwash.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="663" data-original-width="500" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yTz-4kBRq4LZRUJAZr5EEsHtlTboxtwZwJ0t-vd-PVwZm5IRIxpZStrACHYf9ZI8kdsZvuChOkiXBrr4uSKpVfmnR3LMAtS66_IB0Afo1dqor8YRTxrLT13sssSwq0mVBZgVDW-H1wK-n7f61Ir4XEy6EErZK1ZPNoI_-8b7BVWpBwHDhEMkf5SKig/w482-h640/Saddam%20Hussein,%20by%20Mr_%20Brainwash.jpeg" width="482" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;"><br /><br /> For Khalil Awawdeh<br /><br />And Venus' son replied: 'Your bow, Apollo,<br />May vanquish all, but mine shall vanquish you.<br />As every creature yields to power divine,<br />So likewise shall your glory yield to mine.”<br />― Ovid, Metamorphoses<br /><br />My name is Hassan al-Hazeem and once upon a time they called me the Philistine of Baghdad. I was a ---- for hire under then dictator Saddam Hussein. I had the longest and thickest qadib in all of Iraq. I could overtake a woman with my looks alone and she would come back for more and they all loved me – because they always came back. Is that not the test of a true lover? Okay, don’t look at me that way. Okay, okay, I am lying. I am a liar. They never came back. But they were infidels and inside their hearts they wanted to come back! And yes, yes, I was a ----- for hire, woman-seducer.<br /><br />They would wake us at four in the morning – the ----- squad – and give us goat cheese and bread for breakfast. Since we were part of the Department of ----- and Retributions, we walked the fine line between being spoiled and mistreated in order to keep us guessing. Why? I do not know.<br /><br />And as I so fondly recall, it was a favorite moment of mine – to be sharing a silent meal with pals before a raid. It reminded me of Tom Cruise and his pals in the epic Hollywood film Top Gun, where the Great Satan fights an Eastern Bloc break-away republic. Okay, okay, they weren’t really my pals.<br /><br />There was always much competition in the squad. Members had the, how do you say? There was the bickering, the cattiness. Who had the inherent, natural willfulness to make their qadib hard for long periods of time with will power alone like porn star? Who could go the extra distance? Who was so handsome that the victim just give themselves to him? We were an elite squad. Even if we didn’t really get along we were at the very least, efficient. We were like the legend James Brown would say, the sex machines. I believe that some of the hostilities had to do with some particular members being too bossy trying to tell others what to do.<br /><br />Husky Habibi was a thorn on my side. He was an oversized bully who mistakenly thought I was weak, that I would take a bow to his imperialistic corpulence spread out all over his vanished waist, resembling the shape of an egg. He tried to trip me once by sticking out his foot as I walked pass him, and fortunately I managed to regain myself and shove him until he lost his balance. Very lucky for him that our shift manager was in the vicinity and I did not continue. That was some very good luck for him let me tell you, for I would have defeated him like Iraq did America in the war for the Gulf.<br /><br />Did I mention I crossed three borders just to get to Iraq around August 1990 just before the war? Well I did and it is the truth because I don’t always lie. I am from Palestine so that would make me a born-again Iraqi? Or a Palestinian in Iraq? That was a joke and it doesn’t matter that you don’t laugh.<br /><br />I will enter into my origin story briefly, for every hero has an origin story. I will state my reason for crossing the border. Armageddon was set to begin when America went to war with Iraq over Kuwait, and since my abusive stepfather kept scolding me about entering into some type of employment I decided to leave. I ran off after leaving a very wordy, emotional letter to my mother and little brother Muhammad – a good kid who longs to be a football star. There was also a deep dark secret I held. A secret only known by very few members of my family – my great grandmother was a Jew. She was born a dark skinned, Sephardi Jew and had fallen into an illicit affair with my great grandfather Fawzi bin Ali Al Hazeem. This all happened in the 1920s.<br /><br />There was a riot and my great grandfather saved my Great Grandmother (Jaleh) thinking he was saving a pretty Arab girl, or so the tale goes. She was almost trampled by an angry mob and my Great Grandfather scooped her up with his long hairy arms popping out from under a stage at an Arab rally. And under that very same stage they made whoopee while (apparently) oblivious to the violence outside. As my mother tells the story, it was love at first sight for my Great Granddad. And since true love was his only religion, her Jewishness was never a concern for the head between his legs had already made up its mind. Awww, the head between our legs! How it corrupts us! This was something my mother hid from us very badly.<br /><br />My Great Grandmother was forced to go into hiding, after being deemed a traitor to her people and a whore. There were many attempts on her life, which my Great Grandfather, with his bear-like strength and bravery was able to thwart. The Jews now considered her a "lost" woman.<br /><br />My Great Grandmother’s German passport was kept by my mother as insurance – against whom? Against the Zionists? The Israeli missiles?<br /><br />Long story short; confused, repulsed, and disgusted by the Jew inside me, I ended up in Baghdad to defend her against her enemies in the great war of the gulf. The way I saw it back then I needed to reconcile with my impure blood, make a type of amends with my tragic origins. But either way with the aid of my ambition I tried to join the Royal Guard but I was not good enough, but they liked my personality and was shuffled to the Super Secret ----- Squad after being caught with the mistress of a traitorous army captain. Apparently, according to rumors, I much impressed the generals with my girth.<br /><br />So where was I? Our grand leader Saddam had called a meeting of the SSRS before Tuesday night prayer. The rumors were that he would introduce us to the newest squad member – a secretly trained ----- abuser that had been under intense lock and key until now. We all wondered what new style of ----- abuse this member would bring to our elite unit: whips and brooms? Handcuffs? Western S&M tactics? Saddam was known to have a soft spot in his heart for S&M. He found it interesting from both sides – from whip handler to receiver of the whip. The redness of the victim’s buttocks, he once stated to the group during pre-shift, was “like the beauty of the Iraqi sun setting on the faces of one hundred thousand virgins – in unison, with the light of the sun reflecting off each virginal cheek like a visual symphony of light.”<br /><br />As we sat for the introduction Husky Habibi stared at me with his lazy right eye and swollen head. I gave him the look of “I will kick your ass like a goat you very, very, very husky pig.” Later, after the meeting I will get in his face and dare him to take a swing and I will more than likely shove him down the stairs again. That husky camel of a man, how I hate him so. But please, my dear friend, don’t get me wrong for I have nothing against the overweight for most are very lovable and tender hearted. My grandfather was a husky person and the strongest in his village. He would showcase his strength at weddings by bending solid metal bars. Most women were impressed, and that is why they killed him. My point being that I would hate Habibi equally even if he was skinny.<br /><br />When the Royal bodyguards walked into the room, Saddam was introduced and we all stood.<br /><br />“Your Royal majesty. All stand.”<br /><br />After our brief salute, we all sat facing a map of Baghdad. Saddam wore a black Versace suit with a burgundy tie. How did I know that it was Versace? Because he said it was Versace. He smoked a Cuban cigar and he nodded to everyone.<br /><br />“Allah-AK-bar!”<br /><br />“Allah-AK-bar,” we repeated.</span><div><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzH_w2mKb2_lAdugFRpM_OVGWuDonHU3jC0TuMn2jh9cRzsjN6hC-rp-j63-6GcUGvR8idY_bPDUzOZqVWCgsjjSI_ymaSkH0aWE4tBRIllqdNLZ82PuWRg0IGtgJi0xElheGcvlIB1q5ah_N8eXurDi0bxwCCQxFLu4X442HyYPWn_khrnnfztDrnUw/s1280/_.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="967" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzH_w2mKb2_lAdugFRpM_OVGWuDonHU3jC0TuMn2jh9cRzsjN6hC-rp-j63-6GcUGvR8idY_bPDUzOZqVWCgsjjSI_ymaSkH0aWE4tBRIllqdNLZ82PuWRg0IGtgJi0xElheGcvlIB1q5ah_N8eXurDi0bxwCCQxFLu4X442HyYPWn_khrnnfztDrnUw/w485-h640/_.jpeg" width="485" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;"><br /><br />The minister of defense stepped up. He was a bald man with a big nose and a dark mustache. He looked like Arab Magnum P.I. As of matter of fact, the mustache is so popular in Iraq, that most males resemble that ingenious Hawaiian detective.<br /><br />“As you may be aware, we’ve had some trouble with dissidents who don’t have sisters or wives and their mothers have passed away. Therefore, in situations like those, the ----- Squad is useless because we can’t have men ----- men, even though a couple of you were inclined to volunteer.”<br /><br />We looked at the gay ones. They put their heads down.<br /><br />“So we crunched various ideas and most were executed until one proved itself far superior to the others. And today, we are happy to present the proven idea.”<br /><br />He motioned to a royal guard who walked over to the door and opened it. Behind the door stood a small man under a black cloak very similar to a monk. The man walked over and stood next to Saddam. We could not see his face. We all wondered what evil, ugly face lay under the cloak for we were all ugly.<br /><br />“This is Ludmilla.”<br /><br />We looked at each other in confusion and our jaws dropped when the man let his cloak fall to the ground and there was a pretty girl underneath. She had long black hair, in a pony tail. She looked like Eastern European version of Audrey Hepburn. We were scared, and anxious, and aroused, and in a big, very big, maze of confusion. But of course, we were the SSRS and we were trained to be aroused at a moment’s notice.<br /><br />She was like a diamond of a day. I pictured sights I had never seen like deserts covered in snow and possible things that were once impossible like a sparrow flying to President Hussein’s hand and perhaps taking a bite or two. She had a pretty face and her eyes were golden brown. My rapidly beating heart sank down to my stomach, and it was digested and released through my rectum. I knelt down and picked up my beshitted heart, and ate and swallowed my heart, and I promise you, my dear friends, I could have gone through the same motion all day.<br /><br />She held a long, black baton behind her.<br /><br />“That is her weapon,” the minister said. “With which she will inflict pain.”<br /><br />She rolled the baton with her right hand. Her tiny body gave her the physical presence of a French ingénue from one those black and white movies my uncle Shafik used to watch on VHS. She was an angel! Then our president whispered into the ear of the Minister of Defense. And the minister looked at our entire group.<br /><br />“Any questions?”<br /><br />Slappy Kareem raised his trembling hand and quickly brought it down.<br /><br />After the meeting, all the males stood in one corner and she in another. We gossiped, but in a whisper. Our egos could not handle this – a woman that ----- with a stick. What kind of shit was this? What was our great leader Saddam trying to tell us? We scratched our heads in unison. Stumped monkeys we were.<br /><br />When everyone else moved on, I found an excuse to remain. I decided to make an effort for there was something in her eyes that attracted me. They were very deep and emotional eyes.<br /><br />They predicted her mood like an Al-Roker predicting the weather.<br />Her mood was silent, and I felt a calm energy emanate from her. Her presence was a very soothing thing to me. It gave me life like shot of Cuban espresso – which I have never had, but heard Saddam takes every day for he has it flown to him personally from the island of Cuba by most famous communist in the world, Fidel Castro.<br /><br />Five minutes later, our daily mission sheet was posted on the bulletin board. My heart’s drumbeat sped upon reading that Ludmilla and I had been assigned to the same neighborhood. So with brave face, I approached her.<br /><br />“Hello,” I said.<br /><br />“Yes,” she responded.<br /><br />“I have noticed on Mission Sheet that we are assigned to same neighborhood duty.”<br /><br />“Really,” she said.<br /><br />“Would you like ride in my vehicle with me?”<br /><br />She did not say anything for 15 seconds. She just looked at me, examining me with those pretty eyes.<br /><br />“Okay,” she said. “But are you safe driver?”<br /><br />I smiled. “Of course, come, I will show you to my vehicle.”<br /><br />I led her confidently to my vehicle, a 1985 Volga GAZ-3102 in good condition. Its color was the color blue sky. I’m sure she was impressed because in Iraq you either had Volga or your feet. Let me tell you that in Iraq you could never hope to be like Saddam or his sons with Mercedes Benz, driving to the markets taking young girls from their families never to be seen again. And who wouldn’t want to have that kind of power?<br /><br />As I drove, she looked out the window most of the ride. She seemed very serious staring at the faces outside the vehicle. I tried to start conversation with talking about myself and then I would barrage her with questions like a George Clooney in ER.<br /><br />“I am from Palestine – occupied territory. I came to Iraq to defend her against the evil Bush administration.”<br /><br />She did not say anything back to me. Not to worry, I thought, I continued to barrage her with endless questions until conversation was created and ultimately good rapport that lead to friendship, and perhaps a request to her father for marriage. I had reached that age where prostitutes had run their course, and -----, well, it was -----.<br /><br />“And you are from,” I began.<br /><br />“I am from Russia.”<br /><br />“Russia? The Volga is Russian like you. What is your birth city?”<br /><br />“Chechnya.”<br /><br />“You are communist?”<br /><br />“I hate communists.”<br /><br />“How old are you?”<br /><br />“27.”<br /><br />“Do you like food?”<br /><br />“Yes.”<br /><br />“Do you eat Russian caviar?”<br /><br />“No.”<br /><br />“Are you married?”<br /><br />“No.”<br /><br />“You have pretty smile, do you have pretenders?”<br /><br />“No.”<br /><br />“How did you get into ----- business?”<br /><br />“I am fond of watching men get pleasure.”<br /><br />“How can a man get pleasure from your stick? It is brutal. It is natural for man to ----- woman, not so for woman to ----- man.”<br /><br />“You are an idiot.”<br /><br />“I am honest. But I apologize if I surmised too much. Are you virginal?”<br /><br />“You are a fool.”<br /><br />“But you are like young, little girl, you have innocent face, I doubt a man has entered you. A woman with experience, she has experience in her face.”<br /><br />“You are a clown and a fool.”<br /><br />“You are angelic.”<br /><br />“You are hairy like monkey.”<br /><br />“You are soft like rose.”<br /><br />“You are not original.”<br /><br />“I want to witness your -----s.”<br /><br />“We are here.”<br /><br />“Yes, we are,” I said, hitting the brakes.<br /><br />“Thank you for the ride.”<br /><br />“No problem. I love you.”<br /><br />“Excuse me?”<br /><br />“Nothing, I am sorry. We meet back here.”<br /><br />“Hmm. Yes, okay.”<br /><br />We were in a poor neighborhood South of Baghdad. We got out of my loyal Volga, and went forth to our -----s. She rushed off across the street like Sub Zero in Mortal Kombat 2 video game. I was happy that her mission was two houses from mine. In case of any complications I could rush to her aid.<br /><br />My victim lived in a small two bedroom house with an ugly gray door. My orders were to ----- the oldest daughter of an un-loyal Ba’ath Captain. He would be taught a valuable lesson by punishing next of kin. According to my fact sheet, the victim was 43 years old and weighed 275 lbs. I much preferred the ----- of a much smaller and younger woman but in the end a ----- was a -----, and besides I had a job to do.<br /><br />I paused before the door to wrap my keffiyeh over my face like ninja. I picked the lock and entered the house. A kitchen was before me and to my right a living room. The bedroom was past the kitchen at the end of a small hallway.<br /><br />I continued down the hall to the bedroom and stopped for a moment before the door. When I opened the door, there before me lay my victim asleep and unsuspecting of my imminent threat. Unaware in her sweet dreams that she would soon be forced into beautiful intercourse, indeed the most beautiful intercourse ever to be had in her soulless life, from the Bill Clinton of Baghdad.<br /><br />I stood before the bed and looked at her, admiring her chubby, cheeky visage. She was a very husky woman, even huskier than I had pictured. She lay face up snoring loudly. Her snores were like the roar of a thousand lions as they bounced from the walls in an erratic symphony. And at one point, her snoring was so loud and intense that it seemed like she was choking on a bone. There were great pauses between deep breaths. I thought I would have to perform CPR, help her get conscious, and then ----- her and that would just be too much work.<br /><br />I unzipped my pants and played with myself while staring at her. I had to work my qadib to ultimate hardness for she was very big and repulsive. Standing there, I began to ponder on the power of me and my qadib. ----- for me was like the power of Saddam.<br /><br />I then proceeded to jump on her like bobcat or mountain lion. She woke up startled while I held onto both her arms. Before she could react, I quickly stuffed a sock in her mouth which I carry with me always for this type of situation. And that is when I threatened her.<br /><br />I said something like, “You be quiet now or you have your last breath. Is this what you want?<br /><br />Is this what you want? You will let me do what I was sent here to do. Yes you will, yes you will.”<br /><br />She looked into my eyes with great fear. She mumbled: “What?”<br /><br />She tried to talk again. I took away the sock from her mouth.<br /><br />“Yes I will, my lover,” she said.<br /><br />And I said, “What?” and then she flipped me over and pinned me down. I had underestimated her strength. She was like bear as she began to bounce and bounce on me almost breaking my qadib. I was stuck in a dilemma, for I had to keep moving my hips in order to catch her vagina. Sometimes I’d miss and it hurt very bad.<br /><br />“Slip, slip, slip…back inside,” she’d say when I missed and then the bouncing would continue.<br /><br />And then, as the backwards ----- continued, she stopped to smell me. “You have fine musk. Curious musk. It is American musk! It is the Calvin Klein, the infidel musk!”<br /><br />At that precise moment, I willed all my strength and somehow managed to roll her over on her back. I pulled out my knife, putting the blade against her neck, and began to sodomize her and she loved this too. She moaned loud when I entered her unsanitary hole. Her anus was very loose, which made me curious. This was all very dangerous work, for I had to concentrate so as not to slice her neck accidentally.<br /><br />I had explosion inside her and rolled off.<br /><br />“Saddam knows your father is a traitor to Iraq. He must do as he is told or he will be punished. Tell him he will pay with his family’s suffering.”<br /><br />She had big, bold, green eyes with a ----- face of sorrowful pleasure. And then, in a moment of stupidity, as my guard dropped, she snatched my own knife and plunged it into my stomach.<br /><br />“Ahhh! You evil woman!”<br /><br />I sprung from the bed holding my stomach, bleeding all over my uniform. This was my third stabbing this year. Most squad members get stabbed at least once their rookie year. Facing an emergency such as this, I decided to flee with both hands clutching at my stomach, running past the kitchen, and through the front door only to collapse in the middle of the street. I lay in the street until Ludmilla’s face came into sight. She looked at me with her brown piercing eyes which now had a look of pity in them. She did not say anything but only grabbed my feet and dragged me to my Volga, our Volga. My seats were stained with my own blood. She drove to a hospital close to the presidential palace, double parked, placed me on a Gurney, and shoved me towards the emergency room, and as I rolled, rolled away from her, my heart slowed like a jazz drum.<br /><br />I recovered in a week and received 17 stitches. The day I was released, Ludmilla was in my room and watched me change back to my uniform. She looked at me like if I was her dog and just peed inside the house. And deep in my heart, I prayed to Allah that I could be her dog.<br /><br />Oh how I wished I was her dog!<br /><br />“I should have left you there to die.”<br /><br />“But you didn’t,” I said, smiling.<br /><br />“You are a disappointment to the party.”<br /><br />“…,” still smiling.<br /><br />“And Iraq, your adopted land.”<br /><br />“I love you.”<br /><br />“Don’t look at me like that.”<br /><br />“But-“<br /><br />”You are a clown to me.”<br /><br />“And you are a princess to me.”<br /><br />“You are a fool for loving me.”<br /><br />“Then I am happy to be a fool.”<br /><br />“You realize we could be beheaded, at least.”<br /><br />“I don’t care. I would risk everything. My heart, this heart, is yours. My arms, these arms, are yours.”<br /><br />“You have lost your mind.”<br /><br />“I want to buy you a ring like in the Hollywood movies.”<br /><br />“I am already bored of you.”<br /><br />I then took a step towards her and she remained.<br /><br />We left the hospital and returned to base where I was greeted with laughter from my colleagues. Amidst all this, I fantasized that I spit in all their mouths. I made sure to let them get it out of their system. This all lasted quite a while. Husky Habibi led the chorus of laughter. Oh, Allah, how I hate his chubby, cheeky face.<br /><br />Ludmilla entered after me, so as not to arouse any suspicion. It hurt very deep inside of me that I couldn’t make big announcement to the world that I cared about this woman more than any cleric, oil field, or very fast and efficient race camel.<br /><br />When the next missions came, my desire to ----- had left me. I think it was because I was in love. My first mission post-stabbing resulted in a broom beating by a very endearing elderly lady who offered me coffee afterwards. A week after that, on another ----- mission, I just tied a woman naked to her bed and fell asleep on her stomach talking to her about the glint of light in Ludmilla’s eyes. Oh those beautiful eyes so full of paradise inside of them. My eyes were caught in hers during every pre-mission shift meeting. She tried to ignore me, but it was evident she felt the same way.<br /><br />Incidentally, one day I just couldn’t wait for things to just occur between us so I decided to spy on her during one of her missions. I finished a quick dry hump ----- on an 83 year old woman, who I will also reveal stuck her tongue inside my mouth and I was off.<br /><br />I crossed the street like a stealth tiger and found the house where Ludmilla was assigned for her -----. It was a medium sized blue house which I entered through the unlocked front door. I went up the stairs following the moaning and screaming I heard. It startled me, but I continued.<br /><br />I took a deep breath and stood before the bedroom door. The sounds coming from the room were like those of a torture room. I opened the door to see Ludmilla holding a very large, fake, black qadib against the victim, who was on his stomach with a bloody anus. She turned to me, and my heart sped up like Arabian horse trotting through Saharan Desert, and before I knew it, I had fainted and could not remember more.<br /><br />The next day, upon the recovery of my shock at the things I had seen I confronted Ludmilla in secret to challenge her to a ------off challenge. I would not be embarrassed by a woman, even if I could love her. The winner got the loser to do anything they wanted.<br /><br />She stood by the water cooler in the empty mess hall. I approached her with confidence and slyness, despite the fact I fainted at the sight of blood.<br /><br />“I was very much impressed by your ----- abilities, and despite my love for you, I come to ask you to a ------off challenge.”<br /><br />“A what?”<br /><br />“A ------off competition to see who is the best? It is when two ----- squad members face off, seeing who can do most -----s per month.”<br /><br />She just stood there looking at me.<br /><br />“You are funniest man I have ever met.”<br /><br />I kept my stare. I know I’ve talked many times about her eyes, but I wouldn’t bring up those features if there wasn’t substance behind them. How to describe eyes that are so soft and endearing that they can put an end to entire armies? There are no words I tell you!<br /><br />She quickly kissed me in my lips and pulled out. It felt like bolt of electricity running through my body. She then moved her face closer to mine.<br /><br />“Meet me in my private room fifteen minutes past midnight, when all are asleep. If you are as good as you claim you can show me then.”<br /><br />Exactly ten past midnight, I tiptoed from the men’s dorm rooms to the mess hall, which I had to cross to get to Ludmilla’s. If you are wondering how I was able to not wake anybody, well I received some help from Husky Habibi’s snoring, which most of the squad was used to now, and that’s how most of them slept through the bombing of missile installations by Iran in the 80s. And another reason for my mastery of clandestine skills was the American Ninja movies starring Michael Dudikoff.<br /><br />Upon reaching her door in my bare feet and pajamas, I tapped it lightly and leaned my head against it trying to listen. The door opened and Ludmilla stood before me in her ninja/burka hybrid not wearing any pants. The hair covering her vagina was thick. I immediately became excited.<br /><br />“Take off your pants,” she said.<br /><br />“My pants?”<br /><br />“I said take off your pants and kneel on the floor.”<br /><br />She closed the door behind me as I did what I was told and knelt on the floor.<br /><br />“I want your pants off all the way, including underwear. Leave your shirt on.”<br /><br />I was on my knees in the cold floor without my pajama bottoms.<br /><br />“Get on all fours like dog. Like Palestinian mutt that you are.”<br /><br />She then poured a very warm lotion on my buttocks, spreading it all over my cheeks, especially inside of my anus. My heart started beating fast, for I was scared and excited. And I kept telling myself that this could only occur because it was her, Ludmilla, and what she meant to me. No other person in this world could do that very thing that I was about to experience. I was so nervous and my heart beat so fast I felt almost a shortness of breath that was followed by elation.<br /><br />The lotion made my anus moist and warm and the smell was quite enjoyable like that of soft babies. She then slipped one finger in my anus, and I whimpered like pig.<br /><br />“Does it hurt?”<br /><br />“No, no, no my Russian angel. It does not hurt!”<br /><br />She ordered me to stand up and promptly shoved me on her bed. She then handcuffed my arms and legs to the posts of the bed and left me there on my stomach. I was spread out dripping with oil. After turning off the lights, I heard a vibrating noise and saw a red glow behind me. She then inserted this noisy, vibrating object inside of my once forbidden hole, and everything after that I will not relate because it was beautiful and private, and a whirl of sexual madness that awoke in me a sensitivity for women and the world as a whole.<br /><br /><br />The following day I was a new man. I was a man in love with a woman. Oh to be a man that knows love is to be a man that does not need God. For a man with no boundaries will not let anything stop him. Or a child taking baby steps on his own? How I am a philosopher now. Or is true love – love for your fellow man? So why do we need God, if we have love?<br />From that special night on, Ludmilla and I could not be separated. Our illicit affair continued in dark corners and hidden alleys. We would meet three times a week in different safe houses, sometimes even skipping missions all together. Suspicions arose among commanders and we had to stop seeing each other some weeks.<br /><br />And on one special occasion that we lay in bed, I with red, bloody anus, she with a bruised and scratched back, we both spoke with our eyes to each other. Our mouths did not open, and we saw in each other’s expressions that we were doomed. The television played the film The Bodyguard with Whitney Houston and Ludmilla was so inspired that as she rolled on me, she whispered, “I will always love you.”<br /><br />I knew then that the Palestinian boy inside me would never love another again.<br /><br />The next day, on account of my low ----- grading, I was asked into the private office of the Grand Ba’ath ----- Secretary under Saddam. Entering quickly, I saluted and took a chair as I was told.<br /><br />“You have failing grade. Your mission productivity has dropped dramatically. Explain yourself.”<br /><br />“I do not know how to explain myself. I have been-“<br /><br />”I don’t want excuses Philistine. You were drafted on Syrian countryside of the border after being detained for the -----s of the four idiot daughters of local sheep herder Ibrahim Nelson. We could have sent you to the firing squad my friend. And who intervened? Answer me that!”<br /><br />“You did, sir.”<br /><br />“Yes! I intervened. You were given second chance to use your ----- obsessions for the power of good & country. Can’t you understand you fool? You have been given a place in this society! Therefore, I strongly advise not test the patience of your benefactors that can so withdraw their good charity from you. Do you wish to die?”<br /><br />“No sir.”<br /><br />“Your ----- productivity will go up. You will go in and out and finish the job. And if I hear anything to the contrary, your file will be sent to the president’s desk for swift punishment. Do you comprehend, Hassan?”<br /><br />“Yes sir.”<br /><br />“Get out now.”<br /><br />I left the office and went to search for Ludmilla to assure her that our superiors had no clue about our illicit affair. I searched the mess hall; I looked in her room and finally ran into her in the locker rooms which were empty due to ----- Drill Week. And as I looked into her eyes, I had a feeling that I had been cured of my obsession with ----- because of Ludmilla. The only thing that mattered to me was Ludmilla and her desires, for I would grant each and everyone. Oh Ludmilla, Ludmilla, Ludmilla! Her name on my tongue, was like Ben and Jerry’s Cherry Garcia (which Saddam imported every year for his month long birthday celebration) melting in my mouth.<br /><br />“Oh Hassan,” she said, with her sweet breath. “What did they say? What did you tell them? Hassan, I am worried, there are rumors.”<br /><br />“What rumors my Russian tulip?”<br /><br />“There are rumors about us, my love. I think they know of our affair.”<br /><br />She leaned in closer to me. “I think Husky Habibi knows.”<br /><br />I grabbed her close to me. “They don’t know anything. What makes you say that?”<br /><br />“He came to me during brunch and asked me for a date. When I refused him, he asked me if you and I were lovers.”<br /><br />“What did you say?”<br /><br />“I spat in his face.”<br /><br />“Oh Ludmilla! How I love you.”<br /><br />“We must runaway, Hassan.”<br /><br />“Yes, my love.”<br /><br />Suddenly there was a loud bang against a locker, and we heard footsteps shuffling out. She held onto me quickly and kissed me.<br /><br />“Just in case, this will be our last kiss.”<br /><br />“Don’t say that. Just go get your mission schedule. I leave one way, and you another. We meet up later.”<br /><br />And before leaving she paused and looked at me with sad, enchanting Russian eyes. “Oh my love, will we fall apart like star crossed lovers do?”<br /><br />I did not say anything because I did not want to lie, for I knew the very answer. I’ve known it since birth. I rushed off to the mission room for pre-shift. I did not take the normal way there, so as to lose my scent from the dogs that had been sent after us. Prolonging my way there, and thereby our very end. I dreamt that perhaps we were still safe, and we could escape. I would not arrive late, but not early either. The missions would be posted, I would pretend to ignore Ludmilla, and we’d be off without attracting suspicion. Then we -----, to make things look normal of course, we meet, and we elope to the West, to Hawaii, where a man can live right by the beach and drive a red Ferrari.<br /><br />Once I made it to the door, I opened it with all thoughts absent from my mind. And upon entering, I was handcuffed by Husky Habibi. Ludmilla was also being detained. Everyone stood before us, surrounding us.<br /><br />“Here is the other infidel, my commander,” Husky Habibi said.<br />Our commander walked up to me. “You have disgraced us, and the Department of ----- and Retributions with your unlawful and unnatural affair.”<br /><br />“It is my fault,” I pleaded. “Please let her go. I was the one that forced her. She had nothing to do, she is innocent. Let her go.”<br /><br />Ludmilla’s hair was in a very pretty mess. She had put up a fight. She looked at me and mouthed out the words “I love you.”<br /><br />“Enough of this. You will both pay with your very lives. To the firing squad!”<br /><br />They led us out to the firing range that was located in the back of the building. They tied us to two separate posts as the hot Iraqi sun beat down on our heads. We looked at each other and I saw the tears in her eyes and I decided to be strong for her despite the precariousness of the situation.<br /><br />“No blindfolds,” yelled the commander.<br /><br />The assassins aligned themselves before us with their automatic rifles – oh what sharp, efficient medicine against this disease called love! The ----- Squad stood behind them. My close friends in the squad were upset, but they could not protest, or express their sorrow for us for they would be killed also.<br /><br />Meanwhile, Ludmilla and I continued to search for that glimmer in each other’s eyes that would validate this very sacrifice.<br /><br />A guard came up to us.<br /><br />“Any last requests?”<br /><br />Ludmilla looked at me. I looked at the guard and whispered in his ear. He went to the commanders and told them my request. They called for a messenger boy. The boy was given orders and he rushed off. It took thirty minutes for the messenger boy to come back with a boom box and a CD. One of the guards grabbed the boom box and placed it next to Ludmilla. He took out the CD from its case and inserted it in the boom box and pressed play. He turned up the volume as the song started playing. The song was, “I Will Always Love You” as performed by the beautiful and talented Mrs. Whitney Houston for the soundtrack to the film, The Bodyguard.<br /><br />As the song played, it almost seemed to slow down time. All my memories of Ludmilla flashed before my mind, and I was so engulfed by them that my eyes became wet with tears.<br /><br />But I soon realized that they were tears of joy for I had finally known what true love was. Love was sacrifice for your fellow man or woman. Is that not beautiful?<br /><br />And when the song was coming closer to the end, for so were our very lives, the assassins assumed their positions once again, and aimed for our hearts. I did not close my eyes. Yes, my friends, I did not close my eyes. And the only other thoughts that crossed my mind other than my love for Ludmilla and my poor mother was this: for all those that hijacked my adopted land, may Allah have mercy on you and each of your souls, you hypocrites, may you survive the end of Saddam as he is swallowed by the West, for when you play with the devil, you will surely have to pay him his dues, for your destiny is written in the blood stained soil and your fate will be far worse than being shot outside a Starbucks franchise in Tikrit, you sons of the forgotten may you perish for all eternity. And the assassins fired.<br /><br />*Originally published in MuslimWakeUp.com in 2007, reprinted at Expat Press, 2018.</span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj19mXeLjGSGI5rv7JZa9eqI-qZeZ63eYzqSDtlowHk3PUAb4TtUCqX5gTABePLQL4WT_rP3qbY68NEmf5gY59EzTIC0EwaNeJpWnNTfhLKzTB_BKfhLHBIPwb-2shDenK-_AsfsoVl8WSWhmStlG4LOwmpbUkP2MJwadYIsUDiQFKcuHjowtrc3ri5jw/s480/Saddam%20Hussein.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="318" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj19mXeLjGSGI5rv7JZa9eqI-qZeZ63eYzqSDtlowHk3PUAb4TtUCqX5gTABePLQL4WT_rP3qbY68NEmf5gY59EzTIC0EwaNeJpWnNTfhLKzTB_BKfhLHBIPwb-2shDenK-_AsfsoVl8WSWhmStlG4LOwmpbUkP2MJwadYIsUDiQFKcuHjowtrc3ri5jw/w424-h640/Saddam%20Hussein.jpeg" width="424" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmWD0ijyl_zgVJK3xzKBn87sT12Ms2lb10uGYd-OOH_Y-gmi2wYx4x0RyeBFC1nnVyO1LrXJHGqY3fPesoAbsT0fE1LnXXwXS-JZSN4L3uKJMfrrJDLg5h1yLjKf-Z9EtokszJclg2ffDwz5vf6Is14hp67_-mNIUTYqzQ_fMoUzojAwwChJgt3_7IA/s480/Saddam%20Hussein.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="318" height="31" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmWD0ijyl_zgVJK3xzKBn87sT12Ms2lb10uGYd-OOH_Y-gmi2wYx4x0RyeBFC1nnVyO1LrXJHGqY3fPesoAbsT0fE1LnXXwXS-JZSN4L3uKJMfrrJDLg5h1yLjKf-Z9EtokszJclg2ffDwz5vf6Is14hp67_-mNIUTYqzQ_fMoUzojAwwChJgt3_7IA/w21-h31/Saddam%20Hussein.jpeg" width="21" /></a></div></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-27503844896689548292022-06-21T20:27:00.001-07:002022-06-21T20:27:35.657-07:00Preliminary Notes on a Miami Cannibal @ Expat Press<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9fI8R4pFJIr48iVgoijH3iQAZnIxaIJZ7CG6ku4jgoJQFulEOnXwfxCxlxcrkRPTwk9XEdSUu1ytQAlvwG3vFpzzxezx5kSJ23UuG0ICQK5OXc4ZnfZI3KqbFMuve47eYuib7k09Ntqtvcx4YUprquTQpKebRX1sopFagVuwBd-LqU52NG0n4GPPrYw/s905/IMG_0226.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="905" data-original-width="729" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9fI8R4pFJIr48iVgoijH3iQAZnIxaIJZ7CG6ku4jgoJQFulEOnXwfxCxlxcrkRPTwk9XEdSUu1ytQAlvwG3vFpzzxezx5kSJ23UuG0ICQK5OXc4ZnfZI3KqbFMuve47eYuib7k09Ntqtvcx4YUprquTQpKebRX1sopFagVuwBd-LqU52NG0n4GPPrYw/w516-h640/IMG_0226.jpg" width="516" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><span style="color: #cc0000;">Click HERE: <span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://expatpress.com/preliminary-notes-on-a-miami-cannibal-fawzy-zablah/" target="_blank">PRELIMINARY NOTES ON A MIAMI CANNIBAL</a></span></span></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-81011158937512692322022-05-19T22:33:00.001-07:002022-05-19T23:17:33.440-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Taylor Napolsky<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw4CkGrh72-AgtLYSrzz2Z25rrQOdxflnwZQUXwVEpIl6jw2jaRWc7p28kSVVHIoC5X7SssxqGrIWBi5F1W0iNBYoEeplttz3gmPaZMxLfOFzzClDN4VfOTdFDm7-beAmZO7oMsOsdeyG58pqE3sr6OtJBGs7rtjWVzHpa10bGHwpEAaoz-0uYEuYH3A/s4032/taylorpic.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw4CkGrh72-AgtLYSrzz2Z25rrQOdxflnwZQUXwVEpIl6jw2jaRWc7p28kSVVHIoC5X7SssxqGrIWBi5F1W0iNBYoEeplttz3gmPaZMxLfOFzzClDN4VfOTdFDm7-beAmZO7oMsOsdeyG58pqE3sr6OtJBGs7rtjWVzHpa10bGHwpEAaoz-0uYEuYH3A/w480-h640/taylorpic.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;">I first ran into Taylor Napolsky's writing at Expat Press. He is a talented, dedicated writer; a most generous, happy-go-lucky soul. You can also find his work in MORIA, Lunate, and other journals. His new novel is called <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09FS59236/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i0" target="_blank">Economic Despair</a> and everybody should check it out. You can also follow him on <a href="https://twitter.com/TaylorNapolsky?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor" target="_blank">twitter.</a><br /><br /></span><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?<br /><br /><br />Making all my money from writing stuff I want—not b.s. articles I don't care about—and having enough money to live comfortably, and buy clothes.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">2. What is your greatest fear?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I hate that it's spiders, but it's spiders.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Umm, I can't think like that.... I am getting over these traits! I'm determined.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /><br />Talking and talking and never listening. For sure it's that.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTJxj7a9-DA" target="_blank">Kanye</a>, naturally. I guess it's just "<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=401hZy6Hipw" target="_blank">Ye</a>" now....<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Buying trail mix. It's too pricey for me, but it's the perfect snack.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">7. What is your current state of mind?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJMwBwFj5nQ" target="_blank">"Nothing bothers me."</a> That's what I'm always trying to get to.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Philanthropy. I'll just leave it at that.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">It's more like when do I not lie. Call me young Simba because I am the lying king.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Hair loss duh</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">11. Which living person do you most despise?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Probably this movie exec guy named Toby Emmerich.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">12. What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Smarts!<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /><br />Again, smarts!<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Not in writing but in speaking: I say "You know what I mean?" constantly. Like, agree with me, please.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I'll go with "what." <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2Yk8xJkMKQ&t=20s" target="_blank">My Brilliant Friend</a> on HBO Max.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">High school when I was the star athlete. Kidding.<br /><br /> I spent some time in my twenties just going to <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRVfysTXhNA&t=29s" target="_blank">clubs</a> and drinking too many Red Bull vodkas every weekend; it was really fun, so I'd say that. I'm pretty happy now too though.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">17. Which talent would you most like to have?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Like a "snap my fingers and I have it" talent? Extreme Spanish skills. Also just being good at learning languages in general would be cool. <br /><br />18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /><br /><br />I'd take more charm and charisma, all the way. You can never get enough of that.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">It's a combo of all the writing work I've completed, and also, low key high key, getting asked to do this questionnaire. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span>That baby thing at the </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AXS8P0HksQo&t=38s" target="_blank">end of 2001</a><span>. Let's fuckin go.</span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seattle, but I could fuck with Miami too I think. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">My laptop, because it's so damn expensive and nice, and the battery lasts an age. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Loneliness.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Well I wrote a whole list of activities, but then noticed it's only asking for one occupation, so <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PolzQMFju_s&t=2s" target="_blank">reading</a> comes first. That's it.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">25. What is your most marked characteristic?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I'm a maniac, (in a good way), and always trying to be more of one. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">26. What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Being able to be real with them. The more real I can be, the more satisfying.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">27. Who are your favorite writers?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span>I have to start with </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAs3E1AgNeM&t=1480s" target="_blank">Morrison</a><span> (I'm not talking about that Doors singer, either). Also </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtVYanNYl2Y&t=2s" target="_blank">Sayaka Murata</a><span> (Convenience Store Woman is my book). And Shakespeare. Alejandro Zambra rocks my world. I'm not listing my very favorite though.</span></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Hamlet is the most beautiful in all dimensions.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Sojourner Truth. She went so hard for what she believed in. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">30. Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Michael B. Jordan, Otessa Moshfegh and Rosalía!<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">31. What are your favorite names?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I mostly don't think about names like that. I'll try though: Lakeith; Alana; Sergio; Naomi. That's about all I have. Judging by these ones I landed on, I suppose I like longer-syllabled names.<br /><br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">People's obnoxious opinions on Twitter that I just have to tolerate, mostly, because why waste my time arguing. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">One time I kind of cut ties with someone just because it seemed like the cool, trendy thing to do at the moment. It was dumb. It's all good though, because they seemed chill about it, and also I learned the lesson: Never the fuck will I do that again.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">34. How would you like to die?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Old. Extremely old. <br /><br /> <br />35. What is your motto?<br /><br /><br />Nothing bothers me and be a maniac.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0GN9xJhXWOMnOPFtmtsjTqsqZ6nWblMEqPt8UAjF4x6EZsvxOSdSV4go2Ju0ENifid06M3jN6WdAekjXD-SrWL1DxoyY3ZmbyJtzDN3Wfq79ZIBIuzQDooNl5VFkfdVYdDztFzvkxIHbbFpyr7VEjw7AL6wpU1zq3VTWMhwys_YwY328JGNtjlDB0iA/s1429/EconomicDespair.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1429" data-original-width="1000" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0GN9xJhXWOMnOPFtmtsjTqsqZ6nWblMEqPt8UAjF4x6EZsvxOSdSV4go2Ju0ENifid06M3jN6WdAekjXD-SrWL1DxoyY3ZmbyJtzDN3Wfq79ZIBIuzQDooNl5VFkfdVYdDztFzvkxIHbbFpyr7VEjw7AL6wpU1zq3VTWMhwys_YwY328JGNtjlDB0iA/w448-h640/EconomicDespair.jpg" width="448" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /><br /></span><br /></div></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-40664453733124193982022-04-05T16:26:00.054-07:002022-04-05T20:43:43.063-07:00Proust Questionaire: D'urban Moffer<br /><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcC7rbM4DOJf7hn2RDsLn1GQMjHVxmHZQbSJ1wIqMLKo7gk_cLXzuiFAGhCkijpOttEwISAM-MC27DrTr31uMew_pJQ3lAtm1oIXgMK0UbLoPE7z2e94oIxPzhPncvpMnhZNwDB6iOyPbIeF8svodmVdg6AukfHwOVSMyGBNSU4VV1dHz_z4HACb77PA/s480/Jersey%20Shore%20Me.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="320" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcC7rbM4DOJf7hn2RDsLn1GQMjHVxmHZQbSJ1wIqMLKo7gk_cLXzuiFAGhCkijpOttEwISAM-MC27DrTr31uMew_pJQ3lAtm1oIXgMK0UbLoPE7z2e94oIxPzhPncvpMnhZNwDB6iOyPbIeF8svodmVdg6AukfHwOVSMyGBNSU4VV1dHz_z4HACb77PA/w426-h640/Jersey%20Shore%20Me.jpg" width="426" /></a></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>D'urban Moffer is the producer of <a href="https://anchor.fm/appropouture" target="_blank">alt-write</a>, a costumed performer, writer of <a href="https://expatpress.com/product/american-kashayas-durban-moffer/" target="_blank">American Kashayas</a>…the book is a collection of poetic shrapnel fragments about the American psyche<span><br /><br /> 1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?</span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></span><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">A mean temperature of 80 degrees F, a Swiss Family Robinson tree house and a legion of Latinx warriors.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">2. What is your greatest fear?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Boredom.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">My big fat yap's propensity to flap.<br /><br /> <br />4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">See answer to previous question.<br /><br /> <br />5. Which living person do you most admire?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I try not to, but it's probably someone none of you would know from my secret lives.<br /><br /> <br />6. What is your greatest extravagance?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Costumery, media and Home Shopping Network.<br /><br /> <br />7. What is your current state of mind?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I'll answer this with movie references: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2h5Pnk7AhTQ" target="_blank">Blair Witch</a>, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpK36FZmTFY" target="_blank">Willy Wonka</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKPFC8DA9_8" target="_blank">Brazil</a>.<br /><br /> <br />8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Piety.<br /><br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">When I'm on the internet.<br /><br /> <br />10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /> <br /> I cannot mold it, no matter how I try, to mold it like Silly Putty.<br /><br /><br />11. Which living person do you most despise?<br /><br />Currently, that would be The Chairman and all that he stands for.<br /><br /> <br />12. What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Rationality.<br /><br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /> <br /> See answer to previous question.<br /><br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /><br />Y'know? Whatever, maaannnn...<br /><br /><br />15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br />They number six. Four are human, two are not.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?<br /><br />Here- now.<br /><br /><br />17. Which talent would you most like to have?<br /> <br /> An eidetic memory. Also, a business acumen.<br /><br /> <br />18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /><br />My desire to be ever-changing.<br /><br /> <br />19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Myself.<br /><br /> <br />20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Scatophaga stercoraria<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?<br /> <br /> Belize.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">My betrothed.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Abject desperation.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Mortician.<br /><br /> <br />25. What is your most marked characteristic?<br /> <br /> My hypnoidal eye.<br /><br /> <br />26. What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Rationality and loyalty. Failing that, a willingness to sexualize any situation.<br /><br /><br />27. Who are your favorite writers?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Kale Darnegie<br /> Burma Bombspeck <br /> Daniel Cravey <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Either Jiminy Carter or Out-In-The-Shed.<br /><br /> <br />29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmanuel Ambroise Diggs<br /><br /> <br />30. Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Anyone who has no fucks to give but a heart of gold.<br /><br /><br />31. What are your favorite names?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Dirty ones in foreign languages. Or pharmaceutical ones.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Social manipulation and/or interpersonal treachery.<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Hurting anyone I've ever loved.<br /><br /><br />34. How would you like to die?<br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lightning strike or anvil falling from the sky.<br /><br /> <br />35. What is your motto?<br /> <br /> Currently: 'Live like Human Resources is watching.'<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></span><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqCOARd07jRfkIODCRu1qjzLZilQeKhoy7eqjrivjfZWtc698yDHP0iDsFmbln05I8lqZvL2K1a847W_3RSYZQLR4PZvjNXPnD0PDwpouvl80VTBOO05gRgk21daWg4R4lYIr2zqznFqrV5Y_tSMCgVj2PXDDFxrbW8M9B6HyGGLMH0_BQBmyRovZFzQ/s1887/IMG_3011.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1887" data-original-width="1229" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqCOARd07jRfkIODCRu1qjzLZilQeKhoy7eqjrivjfZWtc698yDHP0iDsFmbln05I8lqZvL2K1a847W_3RSYZQLR4PZvjNXPnD0PDwpouvl80VTBOO05gRgk21daWg4R4lYIr2zqznFqrV5Y_tSMCgVj2PXDDFxrbW8M9B6HyGGLMH0_BQBmyRovZFzQ/w416-h640/IMG_3011.jpg" width="416" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /></div><br /><br /><br />mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-50585394832607583622022-04-01T12:57:00.000-07:002022-04-01T12:57:28.802-07:00Our Little House in Lisbon: An Excerpt from GITANES just posted at Expat Press<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH5RM3s0wTYEaOkgnLQvBynOw9nNv2RGVKm76JctecA00kPnoNHLVtZ8pkNVJAQngYXrlVHcV1zjXCIR40lMe4rwgqZudYRKGrA1oKis0gPANMe82RqrFyQMi30StQdr1i-1qQJmPG_-Edj8XVmAmvYhQcDQu4ePtS4ikwefNUaNMDJEMMSosovLnecg/s3868/hugo-sousa-m7_lccaGaYA-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3868" data-original-width="2656" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH5RM3s0wTYEaOkgnLQvBynOw9nNv2RGVKm76JctecA00kPnoNHLVtZ8pkNVJAQngYXrlVHcV1zjXCIR40lMe4rwgqZudYRKGrA1oKis0gPANMe82RqrFyQMi30StQdr1i-1qQJmPG_-Edj8XVmAmvYhQcDQu4ePtS4ikwefNUaNMDJEMMSosovLnecg/w440-h640/hugo-sousa-m7_lccaGaYA-unsplash.jpg" width="440" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p> <a href="https://expatpress.com/our-little-house-in-lisbon-an-excerpt-from-gitanes-fawzy-zablah/" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-19764136212505758212021-06-28T15:53:00.000-07:002021-06-28T15:53:43.599-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Calvin Westra<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs_qfzCZEV9NWQ2kGETSbvlqCSB_JNvXp1QsMK_9qR_JXUQzGFJ7tFDd631MHrvGzzsjJmiZNOs94L7oPfflJs5QAFagCOe_d817LNU2zkYgfdJcZwu91SESxCUeufbE_rgWq7BTMdLnE1/s1280/bow+tie.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="960" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs_qfzCZEV9NWQ2kGETSbvlqCSB_JNvXp1QsMK_9qR_JXUQzGFJ7tFDd631MHrvGzzsjJmiZNOs94L7oPfflJs5QAFagCOe_d817LNU2zkYgfdJcZwu91SESxCUeufbE_rgWq7BTMdLnE1/w480-h640/bow+tie.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://twitter.com/calvwest" target="_blank">Calvin Westra</a> has been around -- his work has appeared at Terror House Press, Harsh Lit and Back Patio among others. And now his debut -- <a href="https://expatpress.com/product/family-annihilator-calvin-westra/" target="_blank">Family Annihilator</a> -- was just released by Expat Press. It's described as, "<span face="Lato, sans-serif">a novella about the writing of a short story about the making of a youtube series called family annihilator that is not about a family annihilator. it will teach you the best method for mopping tile floors on snowy days. there is a sex cult. a secret menu burger is going to kill a man on reality tv. she can pick up her pills today. everything will be okay. bad egg!"</span></span><div><span face="Lato, sans-serif" style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span face="Lato, sans-serif" style="font-size: x-large;">He also makes an appearance in Expat 4 with yours truly (and the rest of the<a href="https://expatpress.com/product/expat-4/" target="_blank"> gang</a>). <br /></span><div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">1. What is your idea of perfect happiness? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Chilling in the backyard, probably reading a really good and long book (2666, Vineland, Windup Bird Chronicles – something you can actually get lost in). Ideally with a stray cat occasionally wandering in the yard, trying to figure out if I can be trusted. <br /><br />2. What is your greatest fear? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Everyone I know and love being replaced by demons that look just enough like who they’re replacing that I can tell who they represent. They all know me and each other and act as if nothing has happened and I have to play it cool and act like these demons are my friends and family or they’ll eat me alive. <br /><br />3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">The part of me that is self-serious and wants to impress people. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">4. What is the trait you most deplore in others? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Self-seriousness, really. I have a hard time with pretentious, name-dropping people or people who seek to hide or distort who they are. Especially because most of that behavior is really boring. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">There was this homeless guy who used to come to my chess club. I can’t remember his name but he always smelled like shit and he almost never talked but he was insanely good at chess, especially blitz and bullet (high speed chess) and I remember him beating a couple of Experts and a FIDE Master once. I think that’s really cool and I like that he just showed up out of nowhere, kicked a bunch of ass, and then probably drifted off to some other town. My friend who worked with the homeless shelter in town knew him better than I did and said that he once saw him running full speed in nothing but his underwear while carrying his beat-up copy of the Bible that he took with him everywhere. I love everything about that guy. He told me he mostly played chess online at the library. I like to think about him showing up at random libraries and playing online chess. He has to be at least 2000 ELO, maybe 2200. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I spend like ten percent of my income at a diner, where I am slowly working my way through their entire menu. I like to splurge and get fried pickles too. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">7. What is your current state of mind? <br /><br />Surprisingly peaceful. I feel like I went through a year and a half long period of feeling very under attack mentally and I’m not sure why. I almost feel like it’s a cycle I just have to go through. Lately I have felt good. Enjoying life, spending a lot of time alone and trying to convince this stray cat that visits my backyard to accept food from me, and reading as much as I can. Happy. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Determination. Giving up is fun and more people should try it. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I guess if I think the truth will hurt someone unnecessarily, I might lie but I try to be as honest as I can be, both with others and with myself. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">10. What do you most dislike about your appearance? <br /><br />My chubby cheeks. <br /><br />11. Which living person do you most despise? <br /><br />I won’t name him but if I ever catch him lacking... <br /><br />12. What is the quality you most like in a man? <br /><br />Humility and self-deprecation. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman? <br /><br />Honesty. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">In person, probably “theoretically,” which is an idiot word I get from my dad that he also overuses. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">15. What or who is the greatest love of your life? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Definitely my now deceased feline companion, Fausta, who would sit at the front window when I was at work and actually wait for me to come home. I hate everything about her being dead. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">In 2009, after six months of fruitless jobhunting in Denver, living in low-income housing with a <a href="https://myspace.com/" target="_blank">MySpace</a> rapper, we suddenly both found jobs and could do things like eat every day and smoke cigarettes and weed regularly. I remember eating a microwavable chimichanga for breakfast and thinking, life has never been better than this. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">17. Which talent would you most like to have? <br /><br />I thought about this question for a long time and couldn’t think of anything, which I think is cool. I’m happy with whatever talents I have, am grateful I don’t have the ones I don’t have. I probably appreciate some things better because I know I can’t do them or even learn how. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? <br /><br />I think I would change myself to be more comfortable around people. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">19. What do you consider your greatest achievement? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://vimeo.com/564821823" target="_blank">Family Annihilator</a>. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I want to come back as a tree. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I would love to try out life in Chicago, Detroit, New York, Seoul, and Oslo. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I have a pair of child safe scissors I found on the ground once and thought, oh, these are really special. I carried them in my pocket for five or six years and now they sit on my desk in a coffee mug along with pens and stuff. I have no idea why I picked them up, or why I carried them, or why they’re in the coffee mug, or why I am declaring them to be my most treasured possession, yet here we are. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">When the voices in your head are really hostile and you can’t figure out how to negate them or defeat them or relieve that pain. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I like being a janitor a lot. I also think being a marionette repairman would be cool. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">25. What is your most marked characteristic? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I am really good at getting in the head of a cat, understanding the cat’s personality, and then doing a solid voice/impersonation of the cat. I have mastered every cat of my own, my friends’ cats, the strays in the neighborhood etc. I can do it with dogs and other animals as well, but I specialize in cats. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">26. What do you most value in your friends? <br /><br />Friendliness 😊 <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">27. Who are your favorite writers? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Haruki Murakami, Philip Roth, Lydia Davis, and <a href="https://neutralspaces.co/nathanielduggan/" target="_blank">Nathaniel Duggan</a>. <br /><br /><br />28. Who is your hero of fiction?<br /><br /><br />Sean Phillips from Wolf in White Van.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I don’t know anything about history so I’m forced to say no one. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">30. Who are your heroes in real life? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">I don’t think I have any but I dream of a world where a hero exists, in my neighborhood, who wears a cape and doesn’t necessarily fight crime but likes to show up after a crime has been committed, with a clipboard and a tape recorder. He’ll take people’s statements and be a nuisance to the cops and then eventually drive off in a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZBNVxPsxFY" target="_blank">Toyota Tercel</a> but sometimes the battery is dead and the cops have to give him a jump before he can leave. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">31. What are your favorite names? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Cyril, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7qhVJIPfck" target="_blank">Cletus</a>, Clem, Cierra. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Boring, insecure people. People who value fitting in so much they can’t have fun, try something new, enjoy life etc. Self-serious, pretentious people. Cops. Managers. Rent-a-cops. Assistant managers. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Regretting things. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">34. How would you like to die? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Either in my sleep at like 120 or killed by a bear. <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">35. What is your motto? <br /><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;">Just don't it.</span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPkczGtg3pOMCZI6p_FONGEKJNylcpRYpeTe2wqkgO8X_VKzTjlcYbuXH8nt8tkF47dToUXXaqb9xmJuOBOBMmIxvhadeX9TeK48uJpbIc9MBfLYhh3iGlFA8VWmxrSl4dJn1Ph3JbGn2y/s1919/IMG_9217.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1919" data-original-width="1242" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPkczGtg3pOMCZI6p_FONGEKJNylcpRYpeTe2wqkgO8X_VKzTjlcYbuXH8nt8tkF47dToUXXaqb9xmJuOBOBMmIxvhadeX9TeK48uJpbIc9MBfLYhh3iGlFA8VWmxrSl4dJn1Ph3JbGn2y/w414-h640/IMG_9217.jpg" width="414" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /> <br /></span><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /> </div></div></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-49626897398740223402021-02-12T21:38:00.003-08:002021-02-12T21:38:55.424-08:00The Fleet Starbuck Blues Band Live at Y&T Records in Miami<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/7P_lWFudfh0" width="320" youtube-src-id="7P_lWFudfh0"></iframe></div><br /><br /><p></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-79240397527983079342020-08-28T15:31:00.001-07:002020-08-28T15:31:51.310-07:00Billy Joel, a Love Story @ The Times of Israel Blog<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8vYZhIyHreM2KPKGjenWzz1B1i70xvm855kfCxFMcKfwPsGY4nWrOvWJ55gDVN_5fb9xAj0TVali0T8chI50JJfsaiDEiQt6yAz84fcxFvmwI33_0NZ4seNhJbwZ2G6NPOhnY_Z9O3fL7/s2048/fred-moon-S9yn7XYqxoU-unsplash+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1366" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8vYZhIyHreM2KPKGjenWzz1B1i70xvm855kfCxFMcKfwPsGY4nWrOvWJ55gDVN_5fb9xAj0TVali0T8chI50JJfsaiDEiQt6yAz84fcxFvmwI33_0NZ4seNhJbwZ2G6NPOhnY_Z9O3fL7/w427-h640/fred-moon-S9yn7XYqxoU-unsplash+%25281%2529.jpg" width="427" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;">My most recent short story, 'Billy Joel', a Love Story, can be read <a href="https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/billy-joel-a-love-story/" target="_blank">HERE</a></span></p>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-7885432630703028232020-07-02T07:52:00.000-07:002020-07-02T07:52:26.725-07:00Elizabeth Aldridge Reads The Last Club on Earth on her podcast: Erisidal Tendencies<font size="6"> <a href="https://open.spotify.com/episode/63zQZIQ9O3HeyRYv5o6H9R?si=4h9YaOq6RIOOIKhlMD-5Bg" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a></font><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVtnwW96JGSKthWtOiWeACMvpIf_LoWLUXbUMcdpvtvySWn4f5C09OZHaMcrA0myRK9QZf-nnnSajSpef1XacaPoL5sr2zg25Z6KYLI2tfxSLJfeYtbnWWKlNVh7ypHpAkdUmSYn__2kSV/s1216/IMG_0966.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1216" data-original-width="750" height="781" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVtnwW96JGSKthWtOiWeACMvpIf_LoWLUXbUMcdpvtvySWn4f5C09OZHaMcrA0myRK9QZf-nnnSajSpef1XacaPoL5sr2zg25Z6KYLI2tfxSLJfeYtbnWWKlNVh7ypHpAkdUmSYn__2kSV/w481-h781/IMG_0966.jpg" width="481" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="6"><br /></font></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="6">IF YOU WANT TO READ ALONG WITH ELIZABETH, THE STORY IS HERE: </font></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="6"><br /></font></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="6"><a href="https://www.redfez.net/fiction/the-last-club-on-earth-260" target="_blank">THE LAST CLUB ON EARTH</a></font></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-71950436235358607552020-06-25T21:07:00.001-07:002020-06-25T21:09:01.897-07:00WESTON, FLORIDA (Circa 1996) @ HARSH<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRt6x66xkJJA8nS9Q14NVDc2jRe-1nBKSS0KVZx1nVEooaBD-I0dXeIAM80b7BE0yb_-6xUQ65I_7PaOoAbWVqbAA_RGTt7qHZdKl70Clsk4s5IWxDb7g-YzpbuYb33Xs5zFIK0joqTXUE/s1168/IMG_0911.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1168" data-original-width="728" height="976" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRt6x66xkJJA8nS9Q14NVDc2jRe-1nBKSS0KVZx1nVEooaBD-I0dXeIAM80b7BE0yb_-6xUQ65I_7PaOoAbWVqbAA_RGTt7qHZdKl70Clsk4s5IWxDb7g-YzpbuYb33Xs5zFIK0joqTXUE/w608-h976/IMG_0911.jpg" width="608" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><font size="6">CLICK --- <a href="https://harshlit.rip/2020/06/25/weston-florida-circa-1996/" target="_blank">HERE</a></font>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-29903548091399965142020-05-25T12:56:00.002-07:002020-05-25T13:16:25.432-07:00Liberty City: The comic.<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieyrlEPIFB-Y1brFLnrvDGOhNL8AgGHaIkb1nNx6ny6bp4I-5lgj_LvGVnpfpV0DzpcGJGHN6PeXNe4JIQ5t7vFQ-oc6C0khL8WdPY5rnMHjbpfnRZV2pcqTQc4isuMmdtYQGoDPA9otem/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1512" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieyrlEPIFB-Y1brFLnrvDGOhNL8AgGHaIkb1nNx6ny6bp4I-5lgj_LvGVnpfpV0DzpcGJGHN6PeXNe4JIQ5t7vFQ-oc6C0khL8WdPY5rnMHjbpfnRZV2pcqTQc4isuMmdtYQGoDPA9otem/w480-h640/IMG_0509.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5it-jA8AU_PQsizToQ20qMAuRkBVFPTxE5m6YyQSeMPU4Ld_6cusJbFgP_cOd-bIPQ5fA28lI_Vhml03770B0CB_Hs_xG1KnjUSt31iXHWG_Mo_sSmKEaJNhXxFr61Aaj2J_-Hh9bCFt8/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1512" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5it-jA8AU_PQsizToQ20qMAuRkBVFPTxE5m6YyQSeMPU4Ld_6cusJbFgP_cOd-bIPQ5fA28lI_Vhml03770B0CB_Hs_xG1KnjUSt31iXHWG_Mo_sSmKEaJNhXxFr61Aaj2J_-Hh9bCFt8/w480-h640/IMG_0511.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrvHzeJEL0zxru7d7F9hbcjPmYBtkxhBW8xBUqNgHcemPATMfekYpxVK6APDdqZD70xqbg1gsRyY-CTHuit5V3JCU4vk7qWKAUe-WzhhB290W61C7491tgnjy77h-uEFjCqBu6_M21a07f/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1512" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrvHzeJEL0zxru7d7F9hbcjPmYBtkxhBW8xBUqNgHcemPATMfekYpxVK6APDdqZD70xqbg1gsRyY-CTHuit5V3JCU4vk7qWKAUe-WzhhB290W61C7491tgnjy77h-uEFjCqBu6_M21a07f/w480-h640/IMG_0512.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4vT1KekQ7auETyeNuGUba6Y3Aef527fOYRXUotLaPwdilTazfyKIcnq9GWzpctMpVJgrwlD5g8bulrG8Sqy8wOgTrPuacbDX7gPSfLI5JZBKSJnRlW8fKsJiJCuYc6pFawS-J8iGG_fdO/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1512" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4vT1KekQ7auETyeNuGUba6Y3Aef527fOYRXUotLaPwdilTazfyKIcnq9GWzpctMpVJgrwlD5g8bulrG8Sqy8wOgTrPuacbDX7gPSfLI5JZBKSJnRlW8fKsJiJCuYc6pFawS-J8iGG_fdO/w480-h640/IMG_0510.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="6">Artist <a href="https://www.instagram.com/brainvan/?hl=en" target="_blank">Brian Van Gold </a>from Oakland and I got together to do a mini-horror comic based on one my short stories <a href="https://www.acentosreview.com/May_2013/Zablah.html" target="_blank">"Liberty City"</a>. If you're interested, you can PayPal me at shelleys_fragment@yahoo.com $7 (shipping and handling included in the USA). I also accept Vemeo and other options.</font></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-53995277128782339192020-05-14T20:40:00.001-07:002020-05-14T21:47:01.846-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Dale Brett<font size="6"></font><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl9h3CxsMrfhyphenhyphen-k3_ov8_hUpOHlo6d9Pc7uqHcYMTsTCR1kz3LfSquuJK-rK9baA4LMpi03gqAOHVQfpc4ngW235Q9JXRJccvc0Xg2M6-E2Cuaj_qeLWPEmkawpqWr3B26Wf-FX575-Qc1/w480-h640/Dreampunk+Dale+Blue+Glitch.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="480" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><font size="6"></font><font size="6"></font><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="896" data-original-width="1242" height="462" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5Stkcw63fV0BcjpyF3OxPwGiwMth7hMX4Tl1Qp-1VQ2x0i6EKDjwu-2THoolfNXUunAGJFsJGbQabhxHUE7Q172YzqYID-3sxrq_IzpFsKrREtv1jQhk8OUaPmoVbrElcnXX6TU245QkO/w640-h462/IMG_0335+%25281%2529.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="640" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Faceless in Nippon by Dale Brett to be published by Expat Press.<br /><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghdDIpeY_qH3cbJQURIRVD1YG0dPYqbTNFVHU_J7LYiFOY7SVltZeG6D0d064s002F-1-trVSFabYcZR1LZZ-ymCAXZxSDSVxWBZo4WGiHvpU35g3ZYZy9197ifzon_HA8lPlf_ED61Zoz/w640-h640/IMG_0336+%25281%2529.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="640" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ultra Violet Torus by Dale Brett (Chapbook to be published by SF)</td></tr></tbody></table><font size="6"><br />Australian writer <a href=" https://expatpress.com/product/faceless-in-nippon-dale-brett/" target="_blank">Dale Brett</a> has been busy. He has two books coming out soon--<i><a href="https://expatpress.com/product/faceless-in-nippon-dale-brett/" target="_blank">Faceless in Nippon</a></i> (Expat Press) and the chapbook <i>Ultraviolet Torus (<a href="https://selffuck.help/" target="_blank">SELFFUCK</a>)</i>. <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Mike-Kleine/e/B0099WR22Y%3Fref=dbs_a_mng_rwt_scns_share" target="_blank">Mike Kleine</a> called <i>Faceless in Nippon</i>, "perhaps the most sincere contemporary novel about banality, modernity and existential ennui to exist, this side of 202X." SELFFUCK has described Ultraviolet Torus as, "a seductive, uncarnate float-fall through a crystallography of love and death and language."</font><div><font size="6"><br /></font></div><div><font size="6">Dale's work can be found at <a href="https://backpatio.press/2019/07/01/faceless-in-nippon-by-dale-brett/" target="_blank">Back Patio Press</a>, <a href="https://www.surfaces.cx/deer-park-iv" target="_blank">Surfaces</a>, and <a href="https://dreamcore.baby/1.htm" target="_blank">dreamcore</a> among other <a href="https://expatpress.com/strip-club-train-station-dale-brett/" target="_blank">places</a>. You can follow him on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/_blackzodiac" target="_blank">@_blackzodiac</a>. Dale's answers are below:<br /><br />1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?<br /><br />Sipping a vending machine beverage while overlooking the cross-section of an <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-lj1xNQmgk" target="_blank">urban mall</a> with zero responsibilities bearing down. <br /><br />2. What is your greatest fear?<br /><br />Dying in the ocean alone. I have had several nightmares about this where I awake, cheeks wet & hot with tears. <br /><br />3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?<br /><br />My sickening validation-seeking ways. <br /><br />4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /><br />Moral superiority. <br /><br />5. Which living person do you most admire?<br /><br />Kevin Shields. </font><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><font size="6"><div><font size="6"><br /></font></div>6. What is your greatest extravagance?<br /><br />Every couple of years, I purchase a ridiculously expensive garment. I am pleased (?) to inform you I own a Stone Island top that cost me like a weekly wage. <br /><br />7. What is your current state of mind?<br /><br />Peaking on NEETness. <br /><br />8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /><br />Responsibility.<br /><br />9. On what occasion do you lie?<br /><br />To avoid confrontation in the throes of addiction. <br /><br />10.What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /><br /></font><div><font size="6">As a teen, my concave chest, but I’ve got over that. </font><span style="font-size: xx-large;">Possibly the way my eyes point downward and I constantly look exhausted because of it. </span><div><font size="6"><br />11. Which living person do you most despise?<br /><br />Fuck, these are great questions. Let’s let it all out. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5-1CUbaz0c" target="_blank">Russell Brand</a>. <br /><br />12. What is the quality you most like in a man?<br /><br />Idiosyncrasy.<br /><br />13. What is the quality you most like in a woman? <br /><br />Consideration. <br /><br />14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /><br />Hyper-capitalist, or something, shitshow. <br /><br />15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /><br />What: silent, empty warm spaces.<br /><br />Who: my daughter. <br /><br />16. When and where were you happiest?<br /><br />In a past that I’ve never known.<br /><br />17. Which talent would you most like to have?<br /><br />Some pornstar skills to reach Nirvana. <br /><br />18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /><br />I want to say my anxiety, but I think that all of its negatives have helped me become a better person/artist. So, I wouldn’t change that. Maybe the internal freak outs associated with it though. <br /><br />19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /><br /></font></div><div><font size="6">That I’m not dead. <br /><br />20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?<br /><br />Probably an air conditioning unit in the Japanese summer. Providing a lone apartment dweller some well-deserved respite from the rays of the forceful sun. <br /><br />21. Where would you most like to live?<br /><br />A minimalist apartment with barely anything to clean or maintain. <br /><br />22. What is your most treasured possession?<br /><br />Quite an uncanny, ironic segue from my last answer. Probably the small Chinese dragon box which houses my gemstones, little snips of quotes that mean something to me and various drug paraphernalia. <br /><br />23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /><br />Being oblivious to how shit things really are. <br /><br />24. What is your favorite occupation?<br /><br />Muji retail assistant. <br /><br />25. What is your most marked characteristic?<br /><br />Otaku level fan appreciation for things I believe deserve it. <br /><br />26. What do you most value in your friends?<br /><br />Their ability to score on a whim.<br /><br />27. Who are your favorite writers?<br /><br />Walter Benjamin, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FQRLN9B69k" target="_blank">Fernando Pessoa</a>, JG Ballard, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dlvle5YBv4" target="_blank">William Gibson</a>, German Sierra. <br /><br />28. Who is your hero of fiction?<br /><br />I don’t really think in terms of ‘heroes’ & ‘villains.’ Let’s go with Dr Vaughan from Crash. <br /></font><font size="6"><br /></font></div><div><font size="6">29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br /></font></div><div><font size="6">Would <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Baudelaire" target="_blank">Baudelaire</a> be considered a historical figure?<br /><br />30. Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br />Anyone who can permeate my </font><font size="6">soul with light. <br /><br />31. What are your favorite names?<br /><br />Kotaro, Arisu, Yue, Jade, Joel. <br /><br />32. What is it that you most dislike?<br /><br />People that thin</font><font size="6">k they are intelligent because they follow populist politics. People who believe their ‘left’ or ‘right’ allegiance in politics is earth-shattering. Those sucky, smug political union reps at college/university. <br /><br />33. What is your greatest regret?<br /><br />Not producing any art while I was untethered & single. <br /><br />34. How would you like to die?<br /></font><font size="6"><br /></font></div><div><font size="6">How the dude in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxhmXWuUsJE" target="_blank">Enter the Void</a> dies. <br /><br />35. What is your motto?<br /><br />Try as best you can not to let responsibility get in the way of a relaxing time without devolving into an absolute asshole. </font><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /></div></div></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-57443754873950950982020-05-04T15:00:00.000-07:002020-05-04T15:02:02.716-07:00What is Rarity of the Century About?<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dzUP_vHuiUZb_CHy84acyfLyoHUj9rZ22S77SQqr9-OPz1L92ODIsrcYMWA0BBh1W1Jwqz8HjtyIS_Zif0jWA' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-30972522770481865752020-05-01T10:54:00.000-07:002020-05-01T10:54:56.612-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Ryan Madej<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghij9MlMJr9qGKRJ09pzf38AJ0e6TEWTW4pjJcXjee-FOLXoDeYK-og8JOaQUbbnZDDj52ePX36tQ0Nj5xwM9jTuwAw7gvbctqLewA1yZPU7WdNxIr4_EHaXiQJVjuX2hGYJNEd54A0pe2/s1600/IMG_E1637.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="444" data-original-width="623" height="285" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghij9MlMJr9qGKRJ09pzf38AJ0e6TEWTW4pjJcXjee-FOLXoDeYK-og8JOaQUbbnZDDj52ePX36tQ0Nj5xwM9jTuwAw7gvbctqLewA1yZPU7WdNxIr4_EHaXiQJVjuX2hGYJNEd54A0pe2/s400/IMG_E1637.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Ryan Madej is a self described,<span style="font-size: large;"> "</span>writer of non-traditional narratives," that hails from <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-s3M4mCo594" target="_blank">Edmonton</a>, Canada. And from what I've noticed, a great devotee of Borges. How did we meet? Just like how I meet a lot of writers these days--Twitter and via <a href="https://expatpress.com/" target="_blank">Expat Press</a>. His short story, <i><a href="https://expatpress.com/night-index-ryan-madej/" target="_blank">Night Index</a></i> was posted in December of last year. His most recent book, <i><a href="https://voidfrontpress.org/portfolio/the-threshold-and-the-key-by-ryan-madej/" target="_blank">The Threshold and the Key</a></i>, was published by <a href="https://voidfrontpress.org/portfolio/the-threshold-and-the-key-by-ryan-madej/" target="_blank">voidfrontpress</a>. He has a forthcoming novel with the exquisite title of <i>The Marble Corridor</i>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Waking up in the morning after a gentle rain, smelling the freshness and sitting down with a tea or coffee and just being. No distractions or expectations. A book on lap would make it even better.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">2. What is your greatest fear?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">That my son is going to grow up in a world of utter strangeness and upheaval. A place that has totally lost any sense of human decency, affection and intelligence.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Anger. It’s a trait that has caused me a lot of grief and regret in the past, and because of this I’ve had to work doubly hard to not let it overcome me. It’s not worth it hanging on to anger, it sickens the body and mind.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Wilful ignorance. In an age where we have such an abundance of information and the ability to communicate ideas it seems we often squander what we’ve been given. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’ve thought about this one hard and I can’t think of one at the moment. Plenty of dead people I admire however. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Without question it’s books...and music. My backlog of books has gotten to a point where I believe that they will attack me in my sleep, but I’m slowly making progress. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">7. What is your current state of mind?<br /><br />A combination of low key anxiety mixed liberally with dreams of self realization. Considering the circumstances I’m holding up pretty well, but to be honest I’ve been through much darker times on a personal level.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Chastity. One should spread love or lust as much as they can. I mean, we’re all here because people decided to not be chaste. More love and lust.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Like a child when I know I’m going to be in huge trouble, or the prospect for huge trouble is on the horizon.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">It used to be the scars on my neck that I got when I was 12. I was almost decapitated in an ATV accident. In reality it has always been my hair which was for many years unmanageable, and now it’s just thin lol.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">11. Which living person do you most despise?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I can’t think of just one, but I often think most politicians. I’m tired of having my hopes and the hopes of others dashed and then have them dashed again. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">12. What is the quality you most like in a man?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Vulnerability. When you see a man at his most open, you see him for who he really is.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Patience.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">“That’s dope!” or “This reminds me of something from the Simpsons” and “fuuuuuuuuuccck” lol</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Some secrets are best left secrets. Keeps the mystery alive.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Probably between the ages of 19-22. It’s the freewheeling time of young adulthood where everything tastes better and the future looks bright. It was a time of great exploration and openness where it was just pure living and no expectations.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">17. Which talent would you most like to have?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">The ability to slam dunk like <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwfW3NxN2qA" target="_blank">Michael Jordan</a>, Dr. J and Vince Carter.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">To be less emotional and more grounded, but I think I’m working toward that on a daily basis.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Finally getting one of my books published, but very soon it will be getting a university diploma.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I think it would be as some sort of jungle cat, whether it be tiger, cheetah or jaguar. A creature entirely motivated by instinct.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My thoughts always lean toward somewhere in Europe, but in all honesty being by the ocean, a lake or any body of water would suit me just fine. Trees, birds, fresh air are the balm for the soul.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My son. The purest joy comes from my time with him. Jokes, wrestling, watching movies, goofing around. There is nothing better.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Something close to what we’re all experiencing now: a lack of connection to anything or anyone we hold dear.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-IvPuAOt-k" target="_blank">Writer</a>. I get to create puzzles and have people solve them, but I don’t recommend writing for mental or physical health lol.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">25. What is your most marked characteristic?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I asked a close friend what this might be and she said my smile.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">26.What do you most value in your friends?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Their loyalty. My two oldest friends have been around for 35 years so that says something about friendship. They are the brothers I never had. True friendship I value very highly.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">27. Who are your favorite writers?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">So many! But a short list: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNxzQSheCkc" target="_blank">Borges</a>, Kafka, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnxweVAvE5w" target="_blank">Burroughs</a>, Acker, Nin, Bolano, Nabokov, Akutagawa...There are many others, but one of the most daring writers I know right now is Will Bernadara Jr. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Joseph K. from the <i><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juwea9X3Guc" target="_blank">The Trial</a></i>. His journey seems so close how many of us experience life, in other words lost, without answers.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?<br /><br />The mysterious alchemist <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fulcanelli" target="_blank">Fulcanelli</a> whose true identity has never been ascertained. Working in secret, publishing two books, then disappearing.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">30. Who are your heroes in real life?<br /><br />Despite all their inherent flaws and the mistakes they’ve made, my parents. They taught me resilience, critical thinking and to take no shit from anyone.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">31. What are your favorite names?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Madelaine, Aurora, and a whole series of made up names like Jimmy Sham and Rich Gaunchfield.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Bad food. I’ve spoiled myself over the years.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Not finishing university the first time around and establishing myself in a solid career. That has caused me a lot of grief and hardship over the years.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">34. How would you like to die?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I have a whole section about this in my book, <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Threshold-Key-Ryan-Madej/dp/1095193074/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&qid=1588300561&refinements=p_27%3ARyan+Madej&s=books&sr=1-1&text=Ryan+Madej" target="_blank">The Threshold and the Key</a></i>! No reveals here, read the book lol.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Be unafraid of yourself.</span></div>
mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-59551770406990399972020-04-22T13:20:00.000-07:002020-04-22T13:22:52.731-07:00Third Excerpt from Gitanes is up at Expat Press<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">"The top two imaginary, gory deaths of <a href="https://expatpress.com/i-wanna-be-your-dog-an-excerpt-from-gitanes-fawzy-zablah/" target="_blank">Javier Mansour</a> begin with him being dragged into the canal behind his apartment building by an eleven foot alligator...."</span><br />
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<a href="https://expatpress.com/i-wanna-be-your-dog-an-excerpt-from-gitanes-fawzy-zablah/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: x-large;">CLICK HERE</span></a>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-8451144898769598342020-04-08T12:36:00.001-07:002020-04-08T13:05:46.318-07:00Don't Let Your Keffiyeh Show @ The Times of Israel Blog<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><a href="https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/dont-let-your-keffiyeh-show/" target="_blank">Don't Let your Keffiyeh Show</a></i> is one of the earliest short stories I wrote. It was also my first short story to get published in print back in 2005. It was published at a little magazine from Detroit called STRUGGLE. The complete name of the magazine actually was: <a href="https://www.strugglemagazine.net/" target="_blank">STRUGGLE: A Magazine of Proletarian Revolutionary Literature</a>. It might still be around. (The website is still up) It was edited by a fellow named Tim Hall (not the indie writer). Back then the story was published under another name--<i>The Existence of Nabil.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I couldn't believe it when I got the acceptance letter. I was so happy when the issue came out, and despite the editor misspelling my last name I showed it to everyone. My friends thought it was cool, but most of them weren't into reading or writing. One of them though, Sean Houser, did read the story and he congratulated me and he continued to read all the stuff I wrote and published. Sadly, Sean passed away not too long ago. So every time I see this story, I think about Sean and about the trippy chaos of the early 2000s. I also think about a little South Miami dive bar called <a href="https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/miami-dade/south-miami/article29605030.html" target="_blank">Fox's Sherron Inn </a>where I worked for about 2 1/2 years and where this story was truly born. Fox's is not around anymore, it closed in Summer 2015. I loved that place. I loved working there, and I loved everyone I met and I still remember them all, from the quirky line cooks, life hardened servers, and happy regulars to the owner George Andrews and his family. One of my fondest memories was the free jukebox that was right in front of the bathrooms, next to the busstand.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Eventually, around 2007 I ran into a website called MuslimWakeUp.com that didn't mind running previously published short fiction so I sent them the story. At MuslimWakeUp.com, a great editor and writer by the name of Patricia Dunn accepted it. She suggested changing the name of the story to <i>Don't Let your Keffiyeh Show</i> which I liked. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Before that, the story had already made its way to my short story collection <i>Ciao! Miami</i> as <i>The Existence of Nabil in </i>2007. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Fast forward to now, the story is back at <a href="https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/dont-let-your-keffiyeh-show/" target="_blank">The Times of Israel Blog</a>. A writer friend in California had recently read it and told me that he thought it was great, and I should send it out again. In addition to being a story born from my place of employment at the time, <i>Don't Let Your Keffiyeh Show</i> was also greatly inspired by an Anton Chekhov short story called <i>The Dance Pianist, </i>which was about a young musician that has a nervous breakdown at a high society party after a girl confuses him for a guest. </span><br />
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mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-10088076921738168082020-04-03T11:37:00.002-07:002020-04-03T12:36:19.678-07:00Proust Questionnaire: Lindsay Lerman<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://lindsaylerman.com/">Lindsay Lerman</a> is a writer, translator, and has a Ph.D. in Philosophy from the University of Guelph in Ontario, Canada. Her first novel, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1944866469/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tpbk_p1_i0"><i>I'm from Nowhere</i></a>, was named one of the Best Fiction Books of 2019 by Entropy Magazine. Published by <a href="https://www.clashbooks.com/">CLASH Books</a>, <i>I'm from Nowhere</i> "follows Claire as she mourns the sudden death of her husband...confronts a dying planet and an emerging sense of self." In addition to her writing, Lindsey is also an editor at the brand new <a href="https://www.clashbooks.com/black-telephone-magazine">Black Telephone Magazine</a>. Her essays can be found at places like <a href="https://medium.com/@lindsay.lerman/judaism-1340ffcb6868">Medium</a>, and <a href="https://thephilosophicalsalon.com/what-climate-fiction-does/">The Los Angeles Review of Books</a>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i>-FZ-</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I think that in the past I would’ve said something like “there is no perfect happiness,” but now, under quarantine… It’s a long boozy lunch with very good friends, a walk and a nap in the afternoon, and someone compelling keeping me up all night.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">2. What is your greatest fear?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Seeing my kid suffer, knowing there’s nothing I can do to stop the suffering.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">My people-pleasing tendencies--the way I’ll contort myself to make others comfortable.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Inability or unwillingness to contort themselves to make others comfortable. And the more general or broad version of that: the certainty some people have that they are really at the center of the world, that their concerns are the only concerns.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Living? That’s the hardest part. My editor and publisher (and friend) Leza Cantoral is pretty high up on the list--it’s like she’s incapable of dishonesty. Also my partner, Philippe, because he has the most finely tuned bullshit detector I’ve ever encountered--his vision is so clear.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Writing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">7. What is your current state of mind?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Approaching contentment and acceptance, with anxiety, fear, and grief hovering around the edges.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">In people who have been conditioned to be self-effacing, it’s humility. In people who have been conditioned to be self-aggrandizing and self-important--to assume the world is theirs--most of their expressions of virtue leave a bad taste in my mouth.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">When the truth will hurt too much.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">10.What do you most dislike about your appearance?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’m only dissatisfied with my corporeal form when I look into my own eyes in the mirror and can see that I haven’t been honest with myself. Otherwise, I’m resigned to being this body and I’m done with hating it. I’ve wasted so many years hating it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">11. Which living person do you most despise?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I can’t focus my hatred on individuals very well.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">12. What is the quality you most like in a man?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Patience and attention, because they are both expressions of care.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">The kind of self-possession that’s made possible by self-escape.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’m sorry.</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Words.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Simple happiness, uncomplicated happiness: Years ago, deep in Oak Creek Canyon near Sedona. Amber, Derek, Philippe, and I bought a jug of wine and a roast chicken and drove down from Flagstaff. We sat by the water, ate, drank, picked flowers for each other.</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Harder happiness, more complicated: The first time I met my daughter, not knowing if either of us would live.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">17. Which talent would you most like to have?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I danced as a child, but my family didn’t have the money or stability that would allow me to keep it up, after a certain point. I loved the intensity and the rigor of ballet, despite the more fucked-up aspects of it (the daily weigh-ins, the built-in classism and racism). I’d love to be a great dancer--all that strength and grace.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’d find a little more joy in discipline.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Not hating myself all the time, understanding that as the first step towards liberation, and beginning to understand how to spread that liberation around--to share it.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’d like to come back as a tree.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’m good here, in my living room, on the couch. I’ve lived a lot of different places, and there are things I miss about all of them, but I have no interest in living somewhere cool or special or whatever. That said, it would be pretty awesome to live somewhere with a social safety net.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I don’t have one. I save a lot of things that don’t take up much space--notes and cards and many of my old notebooks--but I don’t have one single treasured possession. If someone gives me a meaningful gift, I’ll keep it in a drawer or next to the bed for a while--in a place of honor, I guess. But once the magic fades, the object finds its way back to the ordinary stuff locations.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Rolling over and playing dead to make it stop.</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Some combination of writing, reading, thinking, talking, listening. Usually that manifests as teaching.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">25. What is your most marked characteristic?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’d like to say it’s what some people have called my “quiet power,” but I think it’s actually my fast metabolism.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">26.What do you most value in your friends?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Their kindness--there are so many different kinds of kindness.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">27.Who are your favorite writers?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">The ones who make me feel simultaneously ashamed and inspired.</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">The narrator in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1zwGLBpULs" target="_blank">Clarice Lispector’s</a> <i>The Passion According to G.H.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hildegard_of_Bingen" target="_blank">Hildegard von Bingen</a>. The scholarship on her creation of music and theological writing as mystical expression of female desire is wild.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">30. Who are your heroes in real life?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My kid.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">31. What are your favorite names?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I don’t really have any. I find names so embarrassing sometimes.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">People who are stubbornly certain.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I usually regret falling in love--I fall like a body from a balcony--but I’ve stopped letting myself regret this. It’s a gift to be moved by other people. I only regret the times in my life when I’ve been unkind.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">34. How would you like to die?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Either radically sober or supremely fucked up, on the edge of mystical vision.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">35.What is your motto?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Exceed.</span></div>
</div>
</div>
mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684444163609425362.post-91124199179452320972020-03-31T09:42:00.000-07:002020-03-31T09:42:31.591-07:00Proust Questionnaire: James Stelzer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh0aX_iwGruRx5MAyPgl_cb3aGzvD3wy5T0BFE_R3xRGHFE_ALK4ZdKhvMpaCtOSt3bXAO9cNkv6CEgXmXl7eGf96tF-fedGVUW56enh8jygaPjLg-gDIH6WYf4p_RHsjGpJSm-1ia3ZdV/s1600/image0+%25282%2529.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="581" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh0aX_iwGruRx5MAyPgl_cb3aGzvD3wy5T0BFE_R3xRGHFE_ALK4ZdKhvMpaCtOSt3bXAO9cNkv6CEgXmXl7eGf96tF-fedGVUW56enh8jygaPjLg-gDIH6WYf4p_RHsjGpJSm-1ia3ZdV/s640/image0+%25282%2529.jpeg" width="516" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #500050; font-family: "calibri" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.neutralspaces.co/badideamachine/" target="_blank">James Stelzer</a> is a writer and a vocalist who hails from a suburban British town that isn’t quite London. Outsider art fills him with hope (and some other emotions that are weird and deeply confusing). He has recent and upcoming work appearing in <a href="https://expatpress.com/double-standards-james-stelzer/" target="_blank">Expat Press</a>, <a href="https://softcartel.com/2019/12/23/two-poems-by-james-stelzer/" target="_blank">Soft Cartel</a>, <a href="http://www.miserytourism.com/troubling-murmurs/" target="_blank">Misery Tourism</a>, and loads of other cool places. He is also a Prose Reader for Random Sample Review. You should follow him on Twitter at <a href="https://twitter.com/ABadIdeaMachine" target="_blank">@ABadIdeaMachine</a></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">1. </span><span style="font-size: x-large;">What is your idea of perfect happiness?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />A life filled with peace, safety, and love (human and animal), punctuated by the regular of artistic creation. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">2. What is your greatest fear?<br /><br />Sudden, intense, inescapable physical pain. <br /><br />Broken bones, eye-gouging, heart attacks. <br /><br />That, and dying mediocre.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I hold very, very deep grudges. <br /><br />If I feel slighted, no matter how justly, I’ll often try to take it to the grave. <br /><br />It’s not an attractive feature, and it has brought much sorrow to my life. <br /><br />I used to be an unrepentant contrarian too, but then I grew up. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">The human instinct to form mobs against the ‘other’ of the day. <br /><br />I hate that shit, and I hate that I’ve allowed myself to be drawn into them a handful of times. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">5. Which living person do you most admire?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Patrick Kindlon (Self Defense Family / Drug Church / comics / podcasts / fucking everything)<br /><br />He is the strangest, most prolifically fun motherfucker around. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">6. What is your greatest extravagance?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I will celebrate my birthday for like a full month if given the chance. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">7. What is your current state of mind?<br /><br />Feeling good about how I’ve spent the first few months of 2020. I started a well-paid new job that I was totally unqualified for in January, which seems to be going pretty well. I’ve been reading more than ever, tearing through video games as if my thumbs are soon to fall off forever, and I’m finally getting into a good swing with my writing – after thinking about (but not really doing) it for almost two years. Hopefully the Rona won’t fuck it all up now. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I can’t hear the phrase ‘speak truth to power’ without retching because it can be spun by almost anyone to mean almost anything. People whose whole personality revolves around ‘speaking truth to power’ tend to just be wildly unlikable. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">9. On what occasion do you lie?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Sometimes when I’m out for dinner I’ll spend a little extra time when I’m done in the bathroom scrolling to take a break from all the social interaction – does that count? <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My bottom teeth are absolutely fucked. I got braces when I was like 13 and for some reason I didn’t wear the retainers and now I have fucked teeth forever. That stereotype about British people having bad teeth? Absolutely spot on. I’d probably rather just dentures at this point to be honest.<br /><br /><br /><br />11. Which living person do you most despise?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">For the last 18 months or so I’ve been very keen to leave the majority of my beef in the past. I have a host of bitter enemies, and clinging on to the dull hatred I had for them didn’t make me happier or more productive, so why bother? If you’re reading this and I despise you, fuck it – consider this an olive branch. I’m sorry.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">12. What is the quality you most like in a man?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Men with a proclivity for pushing aside their primitive compulsion for aggression and conflict usually win me over. If we’re at a gathering and I see you making snide remarks or looking at me funny the whole time, we’re not going to get along; if you come over with a spare beer and a smile, we’ll probably be friends for life. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">In my experience, women tend to be more loyal to themselves and the people they love - even when things are tough - than men are. That’s pretty dope.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?<br /><br />“Lit” <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My girlfriend, Maisie, is fucking great. We’ve been together for almost a year and a half and our lives together just keep getting easier. Having a companion really is lovely. Also, art. I started trying to make music about eight years ago and I’m finally getting pretty good at it. Same with writing – I was in a long period of stasis until around six months ago, where I just couldn’t bring myself to fucking finish anything. I feel like I’ve broken past that now. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">16. When and where were you happiest?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’m always happiest in the sun. I absolutely despise winter, it destroys me physically and mentally. So between April and September I feel like a completely different person. Letting my girlfriend put weird little tattoos in my skin is fun too. So is trying new versions of vegan junk food. Oh, also the dopamine hit I get when an art project I’m working on is going well is dope too. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">17. Which talent would you most like to have?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I wish I could play guitar. I’ve tried to pick it up so many times, but I need structure, routine, and a good teacher to learn stuff like that. It’s never too late though. Hopefully when I have some savings I’ll buy another one and commit to some lessons (because every time I try to teach myself I give up after two weeks) <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I was a very late bloomer. I’m nearly twenty-six and I’ve only just found myself on the right path. I wasted a lot of time getting here that I wish I could get back. I wasted a lot of time on being vaguely angry at everyone I met. I hope I don’t die young.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My old screamo band played at Miss the Stars Fest in Berlin in 2016, and then played a week-long European tour that summer. A few of those shows were absolutely rammed, a few of the shows were empty, but I booked the whole thing myself, and the pride it generated in me will never leave me. Also, finishing University.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">20. If you were to die and come back as a person </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">or a thing, what would it be?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I would come back at the child of somebody very rich. I would be reborn again in 1994 (my actual birth year) so that I could re-experience / make the most of the rise of the internet while still missing out on the most catastrophic effects of climate change that future generations are doomed to experience.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">21. Where would you most like to live?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">A cheap, vibrant Eastern European city. My girlfriend and I went to Krakow and Budapest last year and both were stunning. I went to Linz in 2016 and that was also lovely. So somewhere like that. I like Berlin too, but really it’s probably too expensive at this stage of my life. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">22. What is your most treasured possession?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">My degree. An unbearably painful family event brought my latent mental illness to the forefront of my life, I had to retake a year, I worked nights at a cinema while I was studying to pay my way, and my Mum got and beat cancer. I spent at least 80% that time period wishing that I could just drop dead. That shit took so much time, money, and mental strain that I still can’t believe I finished it. The process helped me mine out the diamond in me. I am dying to go back for a Master’s when I can. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I’ve been there multiple times and I’m not going back. I’m leaving that shit in my early twenties. The depth of misery is buried in the earth of the past. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">24. What is your favorite occupation?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Recording music with my friends, hanging out with my girlfriend, playing cute little Metroidvanias on my Switch, writing stories and poems that remind me of Futurama.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">25. What is your most marked characteristic?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">I am both lanky and clumsy – a deadly combination.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">26. What do you most value in your friends?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">The ability to cut through all of life’s bullshit and just enjoy yourself. Some of my favorite friends are the ones I have next to nothing in common with because we don’t get stuck on any of the petty shit life throws at us – we just have a laugh. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">27. Who are your favorite writers?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkaQUZFbJjE" target="_blank">Philip K. Dick</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOGru_4z1Vc&t=900s" target="_blank">Kurt Vonnegut</a> - duh! Douglas Coupland too. <br /><br />In terms of indie literature, I’m still very new to this world. However, I’ve been really enjoying pretty much all the work posted on Misery Tourism since I discovered the site in December. William (the editor) has a great eye for dark shit, and for me the site is thematically perfect – right down to the MS Paint art accompanying every piece. Will wrote a stupid listicle for the site called ‘<a href="http://www.miserytourism.com/5-places-i-see-every-day-where-i-would-love-to-hang-myself/" target="_blank">5 Places I See Every Day (Where I Would Love To Hang Myself)</a>’ with photos and everything, and reading that sold me instantly on the site. <br /><br /><br />Also, I’ve been really enjoying the work put out by <a href="https://expatpress.com/" target="_blank">Expat Press</a> recently, and have particularly enjoyed the Plague Readings that they’ve been hosting during the Corona panic. That whole set up is really nice, and everyone who’s participated in them is an excellent writer and an excellent person. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">28. Who is your hero of fiction?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />I tried to answer this but I can’t. Most of the characters I resonate with aren’t really heroes at all. That’s not a great sign, is it? <br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFGH55fjBvI" target="_blank">Borat.</a><br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">30. Who are your heroes in real life?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />My grandad. Sadly, he died when I was thirteen, just when I was on the cusp of being able to know him in any real, adult sense of the world. He grew up in Nazi Germany, and was captured as a prisoner of war by the Americans when he was like, 17, before being shipped to England. I have so many questions that he’ll never be able to answer. He was always so good to me though. I love and miss him dearly.<br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">31. What are your favorite names?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Kurt. Amelia. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbCbwP6ibR4" target="_blank">RoboCop</a>.<br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">32. What is it that you most dislike?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Hysteria and purposeful cruelty.<br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">33. What is your greatest regret?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Allowing my hatred of the world to rule my late teens and early twenties. I wish I’d known better. I also wish I’d known to avoid many of the people that my gut told me to be wary of, who later came back to haunt me because I ignored the red flags. <br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">34. How would you like to die?<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Peacefully, in my sleep, unbeknownst to me. <br /></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">35. What is your motto?<br /><br />Do For Self.</span>mi patria es la literaturahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06804994289703922910noreply@blogger.com0